I'm so anxious!

[willothewisp17]

Cutting a long story short, my baby girl was born at 30+6 weeks, was in hospital for eight awful long weeks and finally got home yesterday. I had been so so desperate for her to get home and was sobbing leaving the hospital every night without her. Now she's home I just feel so anxious, my stomach feels like a pit of dread and I feel sick all the time 😞 she had to learn how to suck feed and takes all her bottles now but feeding time makes me so anxious. That coupled with being a fairly typical preemie baby making loads of loud grunting noises all night has me on edge! I can't enjoy her for this feeling of sheer anxiety!

[hungoverhippo]

To a point some anxiety is normal but you could have post-natal anxiety. I think you should speak to your HV, I went for CBT for mine which really helped. Do seek help it will probably make all the difference & give you back some control

[Mustardnowletsnotbesilly]

Oh my love give yourself a chance. You literally just got her home. You clearly haven't slept well for months and its taking its toll. You are clearly an excellent Mum and everyday as the baby get older you will get more confident. No phase lasts forever and the babies change everyday. You have been through a traumatic time please talk to you partner, friends and HV about it all.
I had horrendous PN Anxiety after a tricky start (not as tough as yours) and it does dissipate. CUT YOURSELF SOME SLACK. You will look back at this time and be so proud of yourself that you made it through. Talk talk talk... You are not alone, ALL mothers are anxious.
If you have 5mins do a YouTube body scan to help you relax.
Don't worry about not enjoying the baby, it will come... I absolutely promise.

[Tootsiepops]

Heya love - tell your HV. I had horrendous post-natal anxiety and didn't get help. Not admitting how awful I was feeling remains one of the stupidest things I've ever done. I'm on medication now and life is so much more enjoyable.

[AshGirl]

I know some of how you feel. DS had a heart defect and was also in hospital for 8 weeks after he was born. We were also desperate to get home, and then absolutely shell shocked when we finally did!

I remember spending a day mostly crying and I am embarrassed to say I felt secretly relieved when he had to be admitted to our local hospital a few days after we got back. (He is fine) The responsibility felt crushing and we just felt completely overwhelmed after spending so long in hospital.

It is very common to struggle when you get home, even when your baby doesn't have any health issues. Do talk to your GP or HV to help you access support. I talk to a counsellor, and DH will be doing the same, as he is finding it all very tough as well.

Do you have meds etc to manage as well? Get in a good routine with these if you can so that you can feel confident with this aspect at least.

for you. We have been home for a while now and things do get easier!

[musicmomma]

I sympathise op xxxxx our baby boy was perfectly healthy, arrived the day after his due date and was a straight forward birth. And I was absolutely terrified. I can't imagine how you're feeling if you've been through all that too. The hospital wouldn't have sent you home if she wasn't a billion percent ready to go they take absolutely no chances with babies. Newborns do make a total racket while sleeping! Just take every minute as it comes, you will get more confident and more secure every day. Right now, the responsibility will be utterly overwhelming,but you've got this! She's safe with you xx I had terrible post natal anxiety with intrusive thoughts and god knows what else, but he's 16 weeks now and it's so much easier. My mum kept saying "everyone worries! You'll always worry about your child" not getting the utter nightmarish terror I was living in. You will feel better, I promise

[Lilacpenny1]

I hope you are feeling better now. I can't imagine how hard that experience must have been for you. If for any reason you are still suffering with intolerable anxiety, do speak with your GP, as they can refer you to CBT therapy or counselling (both of which I've had for my anxiety and I have found them to be life saving). All the best