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Parents of adult children

Sharing a car

10 replies

hallamoo · 08/02/2020 16:13

My DS18 and I share a car (It's in my name, with him as a named driver).

He uses it for college and work. Over the last 6 weeks he has had 3 minor accidents. No other cars involved, think reversing into posts, scraping against walls etc. As a result the car is looking a bit tatty.

I'm a bit annoyed that he seems to think it's perfectly fine to be careless with my car, and not to bother getting it repaired.

I've said he can't use it until he earns the privilege back by getting it fixed.

I know this is not AIBU, but AIBU to make him get (and pay for) public transport to get to college and work for a couple of weeks? He has quite a well paying PT job, bringing home approx £700 per month.

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Berthatydfil · 08/02/2020 16:17

You are not being unreasonable. Cars cost money to repair and maintain

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KiddingMyself · 08/02/2020 16:30

Absolutely!!!

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MissSmiley · 08/02/2020 16:56

I agree he should pay for the repairs but if he is the main driver and you are the policyholder you are fronting and if he had a serious accident, the insurance would likely not pay out, how much do you use the car?

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hallamoo · 08/02/2020 17:27

He isn't the main driver, we share it.

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BrokenWing · 08/02/2020 17:50

If he is using it for college and work it does sound as if he is the main driver.

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hallamoo · 08/02/2020 18:39

We use it about 50/50 each, but that's not what my post is about, it's about whether I should not let him use it as a consequence of being careless with it.

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BackforGood · 08/02/2020 18:49

When my dc were on my insurance, they understood they were responsible for the car whilst they were driving it, and if they damaged it they would have a responsibility to put it right.

However, I agree with @MissSmiley that if your ds is using it for both college and work then you are in danger of the insurance being invalidated for fronting.

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hallamoo · 08/02/2020 18:55

He uses it for college 2 days a week (a friend drives the other days), and work at a local restaurant a mile down the road, 3 or 4 evening shifts a week.

I use it 3 days a week for work and at the weekends, so pretty much 50/50, or probably more in my favour, so not worried about fronting.

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BrokenWing · 09/02/2020 09:32

He's had 3 warnings, it's your car, tell him he can no longer drive it. Tell him you expect him to pay for the damage. Take him off the insurance and with the money you save get it fixed up until he can pay

As he only uses it for college and work, he can bus to college, walk the 15 mins to work and save for his own car which you can bet he will take much better care of.

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Brissiegirl · 21/02/2020 13:37

I share car with dd ( 22) for her work/college and ds (25) very occasionally uses. All understand if they damage it, they would be expected to pay towards repairs. Dd also puts in petrol when its needed and knows not to give car back to me empty.

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