I need desperate advise about my adult 18 year old son. I’m a single mother ( raised two babies alone) with a chronic debililating health condition-fibromyalgia and ME/CFS.
My adult 18 year old son constantly belittles me, criticises me and am walking on eggshells all the time, nothing ever good enough for him.
Example of the comments he makes-
he laughs and ridicules me over my health condition, saying how weak I am at this age, how would i be when elderly? He has come in my bedroom whilst I’m trying to survive, resting during the day and says, “it smells
Like someone’s died in here” ( I only missed
One daily shower, it didn’t smell), if I’m very rarely relaxing and am somehow able to keep my eyes open long enough, i’ll Watch half an hour of Netflix on Tv in my bedroom, he will say, “ you’ve got nothing better to do all day but watch TV”, he cruelly calls me fat, ugly and says I just eat and get fat! He yelled at me saying I have no success in life,
I have nothing to show for it, I’m a failure..when I asked him very kindly to help
Him prepare for his A levels ( I used to teach before becoming so sick), he’s got grade Us for his second year A levels as well. He doesn’t study at home and is addicted to the gym. I feel as though he is depressed but he doesn’t get help despite me trying so hard , I even got him counselling at school but he didn’t go. I can’t force him.
He shares his bedroom with his 17 year old brother,There room is constantly in a disgusting mess- clothes all over the floor including the landing and bathroom floor, he leaves his wet towels on the floor,mouldy food etc, rubbish on the floor such as empty yoghurt pots, rotting apple cores which is mainly my eldest sons mess ( 18 year old).
Worse of all, my 18 year old leaves his apple cores, banana peels on the floor of my living room, he leaves my kitchen an absolute mess - he can’t be bothered to dispose of the eggshells for example on the bin (12 eggs as his muscle building) I just dropped on the counter and even the floor— there’s a large BIN in the kitchen. He makes scrambled egg and leaves at least 4 pans that haven’t been washed in my kitchen to stink.
My arms can be extremely weak that even opening a water bottle is a struggle- I can’t pgysically scrub his pans and he leaves them for days..I can’t even make my self a fried egg as the pans need cleaning that I end up due to disgusting messin the kitchen not even eating but snacking on crisps or a sandwich.
Im finding it so hard to explain in words the agony I’m going through but the stress of dealing with him makes me very unwell. It makes my Fibromylagia and Me worse, I get very sick that includes fevers and chills constantly that I even delibaretly stay out and sit and rest in coffee shop for hours just to avoid coming home. I can’t even afford another single room just for myself to have a peaceful day.
Deep down he’s angry with his acne scars and the fact that he’s just not motivated to
study for his A levels. I have
Suggested apprentichip/ alternative courses including gym instructor:t
Or even going to work whatever makes him happy but nothing works on him. He is at a grammar school, he has seen all his friends do very well and are Going to uni but he feels very sad and takes all his anger out me. If he’s younger brother whose 17 comes home late or plays PlayStation,
My 18 year old is always having a go at me,
Everything my fault. He hates that I’m not rich so he says that I can’t afford a car for him. He always apologised afterwards but this keeps repeating again and again.
I’ve had enough and am
Constantly crying. I can’t cope. I love my son a lot but I’ve come to a stage where I can’t cope anymore. Please advise
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18year old son makes me cry
21 replies
Eyelashes21 · 26/01/2019 15:12
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