DS waking up at night looking for comforter

[Barb2008]

Hello everyone,

I'm new to Mumsnet Talk and it'd be great to hear your views.

DS is nearly 14 months old and we gave him a comforter (the kind that is made of very soft cloth with a teddy head) when we were away on holiday few months ago in Dec. He has been a very good sleeper (7-7) up till then and has never had a dummy or comforter, but with the jet lag he had difficulty settling, so we thought a comforter might help (and it does!).

We only give him the comforter during daytime naps and night time sleep, and he doesn't drag it around. However, since around 2 weeks ago, he started to wake up 2-3 times a night pretty much every night when he loses his comforter.

DS sleeps in sleeping bag, but still manages to move around in his cot a lot when sleeping, and that's why often he will end up at one end, with the comforter at the other. In the dark he just can't see where it is, and then got very upset. He will sit up and cry until I go into his room and hold him in my arms where he falls back to sleep, before putting him down in his cot, placing the comforter in his hands, and then sneaking out the room with the minimum of noise.

He has no problem at all in daytime naps - happily cuddles his comforter, sucks his thumb and falls asleep on his own in his cot.

He did have gastroenteritis around the same time when his night waking started, and we did give him more cuddles and attention than usual.

He is over his illness now but things just aren't back to the way it was before. We had a video baby monitor and can see how he wakes up trying to find his comforter, crying and winding himself up so much that he couldn't soothe himself back to sleep.

We don't want to tie the comforter to the cot as DS just rotates everywhere and we're worried that there is the danger of him getting tangled up.

Shall we wean him off the comforter? But isn't it quite a good sleep association for him? We did try placing another comforter at the other end of the cot, but he just threw that one away. I usually wait for around 10-15 mins before going into his room - shall I let him cry for longer? Have read about Gina's sleep training but haven't tried that.

Any tips and advice that can help DS will be much appreciated. Many thanks in advance.

[BoysAreLikeDogs]

are you able to get identical comforters? then you can strew them around the cot, more chance his wee fingers will happen across one and fall back asleep perhaps?

having a comfort object is important, to be able to transition between comfort directly from a parent to self comfort is a step to independence

[Bramshott]

DD2 has two bears "the bear-bears" and I am still regularly summoned to her cot in the middle of the night in order to re-unite her with them . She is 3 next month.

No easy answers - although I usually make sure I pick them up and put them in her arms before I go to bed at 10.30.

[mamsnet]

I don't know if I can be of any help as my daughter still has one (sounds very similar in fact and she's almost 4..

The night waking is probably associated with when he was ill but it might just be one of those neurological phases they go through.. or any matter of other things..

What I'm trying to say is that I personally have found it to have been of great use to my DD and although I still sometimes have to get up to look for the blasted thing, I'll be quite happy to let her wean herself off it..

which she assures me will be NEVER!!!!!!

[mamsnet]

But they quickly suss out which one is the impostor!

[Bramshott]

Oh yes - DD2 needs both bear-bears - frequently in the night the problem is "I can't find my other one bear-bear". It's quite funny watching her stir in her sleep though - her hands move and start to pat the area around her, looking for them !

[Barb2008]

Thanks for all your resposnes. It's really reassuring to know that I'm not alone and that other parents are experiencing similar problems.

DS woke up twice last night at 2.30am and 4.30am. He managed to get back to sleep the first time, but then just couldn't settle the second time. I ended up holding him and let him sleep in my arms until 7am. I did try to lay him down in his cot, but he just kept on crying and getting really fretful. I know it's probably not the best thing to do, but it seems to be the only way to soothe him at the moment.

Intersting thing is that both times he did have his cuddle, and it seems that other things are bothering him?? Bottom left incisor has just cut through yesterday, so expecting the right one shortly. Also taking him for his 1st MMR vaccination today. Perhaps it's just one of those stages...

Anyway, trying to get an identical cuddle now as a spare - we bought it when we were away on holiday, so doing some online searches.

Once again, many thanks to all of you!

[MumNWLondon]

my DS (nearly 4 and in bed with duvet & nightlight) can now find his, but at that age we ended up with around 3 or 4 in his cot so he would never be far from one.

last night he lost it though at 4am as it fell on the floor. we have lots as he sucks on its ears and paws (bunny) so they need washed daily. he went through a phase of complaining in the night it was too wet, hence the multiple ones. the good thing is that now there are no imposters, he has a bag of them and all are equal to each other (although prefers the newest looking ones). sadly jojo maman bebe stoppped making them so they are all looking more and more worn.

i wish we'd weaned him off it... i can't see him giving it up easily now. he claims he'll still have it when he's an adult! he tells me frequently he loves them more than anyone else including his mummy!

[GoddessInTheKitchen]

from personal experience my dd has got very good at finding hers shes 4 now but from when she was very small i used to watch her sleeping and she would stretch out a little arm, feel around and find it! its not often i get called upon to help

[Barb2008]

Thanks for sharing all your experiences - really appreciate it.

Managed to order 2 more of the cuddle that DS has, and they should in the post now. Will make sure that I scatter them around in his cot!

Last night he woke up twice, but luckily went back to sleep on his own both times. His crying seems to have softened as well, so perhaps his teeth was bothering him a bit. Anyway, hope that he will sleep well tonight again

[Winehound84]

Hi, I know its been a while.. but has the comforter issue been resolved soon after your thread? My almost 10 months daughter wakes up several times during the night looking for her bunny... I dont know why she wakes up at the first place but her little hand starts roaming around looking for it and if it is not there she starts crawling around screaming until she finds it. She has been a decent sleeper since 7 months, but it has been around 3 weeks of broken nights because of damn bunny..