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For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Parenting

would i be completely awful to not have edible prizes or party bags for my 3 year old's party???

20 replies

BiscuitStuffer · 05/12/2009 22:01

I really think it's all over the top and while older children can handle all the choc a bit better, I really think at 3, there's no need BUT there will be 4 year olds there and I have no idea if they will expect it (not that I care actually) BUT I do want everyone to have a good time. I'm going to do party games and hope everyone will just have a laugh, bot if birthday cake and be tired but happy at the end of it all before I send them home empty handed.

Am I awful?

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BiscuitStuffer · 05/12/2009 22:02

bit of, not bot if!!

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GrimmaTheNome · 05/12/2009 22:03

No, kids this young shouldn't have expectations. Though TBH I've never found that kids want to eat the cake at the party itself - it usually comes too near the end so its quite handy to have a bag to stick it into.

HuwEdwards · 05/12/2009 22:03

not awful, but I do think you're missing the point of a 'party'. Choc raisins, buttons, I mean ffs it's hardly napalm....

bigchris · 05/12/2009 22:04

send them home with a slice of cake and a balloon

you dont want empty handed cryibg four yr olds on ur conscience
and your dc will be sad if that happens

BiscuitStuffer · 05/12/2009 22:06

maybe but what's wrong with with a clap and a big well done and move on swiftly to the next thing? It seems to cause equal pleasure but less prize focused behaviour in subsequent games. ie if they don't win the next time it doesn't make them grumpy!

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Egg · 05/12/2009 22:06

dont think you need to give them anything edible in party games or party bag but do need to give them some form of 'treat' with birthday meal like biscuit or krispie cake or whatever. Ds1 would be devastated to get nothing but i guess that's just because he has come to expect it! He enjoys the marmite sandwiches just as much though...

MaryMotherOfCheeses · 05/12/2009 22:07

Being given a party bag is a clear marker that it's time to go. Which is always quite useful, IMO.

BiscuitStuffer · 05/12/2009 22:13

The party bag thing is a strange one - I remember getting them as a kid and being surprised each time - I didn't seem to twig they were the norm and was always pleasantly surprised. I would hate my kids to expect one and I'm happy to go that way but just not for a 3 year old party. it seems so OTT and expensive. DD would have such a laugh playing party games and if there was cake and candles and balloons, she would explode with excitement. maybe my family are just easily pleased

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tryingtoleave · 06/12/2009 09:34

Prizes and party bags don't have to be edible. Colouring in books, or a little car can be great. Having said that, I made a 3 yr old boy cry at dd's party because there weren't enough lollies in his party bag.

RubysReturn · 06/12/2009 09:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ZacharyQuack · 06/12/2009 09:43

Party bags are great for marking the End Of The Party and getting the little darlings Out Of My House.

Wags · 06/12/2009 10:13

I don't see what is wrong with party bags at all. You get to choose what you put in them. Mine have had all sorts from sweets to a small gift to nothing at all. You are right, at that age they won't mind but I like to give a small gift. It makes me happy to treat them. In fact mine are always most excited about the piece of cake they can take home. If offered at the party DD always chooses to take it home in a serviette. Its all part of the fun, unwrapping it in the car on the way home, sticky fingers everywhere!! For the little ones they have often had things like this or this, gift wrapped and handed out at the end with a piece of wrapped cake. No bag, no fuss and it makes them HAPPY.

Bumblingbovine · 06/12/2009 11:05

I had a party for 5 years old a couple of weeks ago. It was at a softplay place and I've never liked those sorts of parties as they feel less intimate BUT all the children spent 1 hr running and playing then the had a (admitedly not very healthy) tea of sandwiches (jam marmite, ham, cheese etc),sausages, crisps, fruit and some cup cakes . We then blew out candles on the birthday cake.

We did one party game of stick the S on the superman (which they were very keen to have go at). I didn't get round to giving a prize because each chld just sort of took off after their turn to go and play more on the equipment.

Then they ran jumped/played/jumped some more. I did give party bags which had 1 wrapped sweet, a homemade cd of superhero music downloaded from the internet and a superhero tshirt (I ironed on some pictures printed on transfer paper onto a cheap white tshirt) also a piece of homemade birthday cake - no almost no junky food except the one sweet.

They actually had a very 'healthy" time with LOADS of running and almost no sweets or chocolates but they had a fantastic time and talked about it for several days later.

In the more home-made parties I do I tend to give out a lot more crap as prizes. This one had very little and yet the kids loved it. Not one complained that they hadn't had enough sweets/prizes

In the end the kids need very little at this age to keep them happy. Space to run and a couple of treast but they don't need to be junk food if you don't want them to be.

flyingdolphin · 06/12/2009 12:07

At most parties for kids that age I have been to the kids never hung around long enough to find out who was the winner, so I think you could get away with a clap on the back and a well done.

I always assumed the function of party bags was to mark the end of the party and to help parents get their totally overexcited kids to leave the party without too many tantrums and screams. Why not just them a balloon and a piece of cake wrapped up in a party serviette if you really don't want to go down the party bag route?

BiscuitStuffer · 06/12/2009 20:49

Thank you everyone! I am now in a total flap. The balloon and birthday cake is a definite. oh bums.

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christiana · 06/12/2009 20:52

Message withdrawn

BiscuitStuffer · 06/12/2009 21:51

oooooh a little book

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nailonthehead · 07/12/2009 09:33

If you want to give books the book people is good.
I would give a balloon and cake also (and also probably a small packet of chocolate buttons).

christiana · 07/12/2009 19:53

Message withdrawn

LittleB · 08/12/2009 12:51

I'm doing a little christmas party for dd and they'll be making their party bags and fillers. Dd and her friends are 4 and 5. I've got colour in bags which they'll decorate for their party bags, they're also going to decorate felt shapes to make christmas tree decorations and paper and stickers to make cards etc. They'll do a treasure hunt to find chocolate coins and snowmen, which they can eat then or put in ethir bags, and slice of cake for their bags. I do admit to also buying a few junky bag pressies - they've got marbels, hairclips, pens and rubbers. I've got christmas sticker books as prizes. I think you can get away without prizes but I do think a party bag is fun. Dd has been to other crafty parties where they've made crowns, masks, tiaras, badges etc, which they ethn bring home in their bags, this always goes down well and fills up the bag!

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