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Please reassure me about an 18 month age gap!!

(7 Posts)
Squarah Sun 31-May-09 09:11:19

My DS is just 10 months and I had a BFP yesterday (planned)and now I'm freaking out about such a short gap. What was I thinking? Will my lovely, fun relaxed life with my chilled-out son change forever? Will I always be tired, not just for the first 3 or so months? How will my body cope with a pregnancy so soon after my last??

Any reassure and tips welcome!

charliesweb Sun 31-May-09 09:28:30

I have an 18 month gap between my first 2. It was hard for the early months, not least because DD had colic. There is a 2.5 gap between no 2 and no 3 and I actually found that harder (probably the effect of having 3 under 5!)
I would whole heartedly recommend an 18 month gap because it keeps getting easier as they grow. They are at a similar level in terms of things to do and places to go. They play together (they do also spend a lot of time trying to kill each other!)
Good luck and congratulations!

whomovedmychocolate Sun 31-May-09 09:29:23

Ah it'll be fine. I have a 20 month gap. Remember you are actually pregnant for 10 months, not nine (40 ish weeks) and once they are up and walking it's much easier.

Your life and your relationship with your son will change but only short term and think how lovely it'll be for him having a little brother or sister to play with. DD is now two and a half and DS 10 months and they are already starting to entertain each other and she really does look out for him.

Your body my dear, may well be fucked though. But if you commit to exercise it will come back.

Yes you'll always be tired. Sorry

Congrats though grin

whiskersonkittens Sun 31-May-09 09:39:27

Mine are 17 months apart and whilst it is hard in the first few weeks it gets much easier when they start to entertain each other and play together and you actually get some free time back shock.

I used a plastic bath support for ds so they both went in the bath together - added bonus that he now loves water as dd used to keep splashing him and pouring water over him so he thought it was great fun wink

Feeding him and trying to entertain her was hard so we resorted to videos - calming ones like Bagpuss, Ifor the engine etc

sazm Sun 31-May-09 09:50:40

i found it to be the perfect age gap actually,i was very ill throughout my pregnancy and found that if i'd waited i would have missed so much of my ds when he started talking/being more interested in the world,
my 2 are really close and its lovely watching them playing together,
then theres dc3, theres a 2y9m gap between the last two,which is also quite nice, as the bigger 2 are big enough to amuse their selves/go out and play/draw etc while im sorting lo out,the only reason theres such a gap is we were happy with 2 then changed our minds lol!if i'd known we were going to have a 3rd then i would have had him sooner,

my friend has just had a baby theres an 11 month gap between her 2!

meep Sun 31-May-09 09:53:25

I have a 20 month age gap - dd2 is 10wo now and I have settled into things. The thought of coping each day is actually worse than the reality!

Agree with whomoved - my body is well and truly fucked grin! Watch your back and hips lifting your ds - I had to have physio and was in a bit of pain towards the end of the pregnancy.

Dd1 didn't start walking until I was about 5 months pregant - my biggest tip is to encourage walking/stair climbing etc as much as you can - easier to transport 2 around if one is walking!

Have to say that the sleep deprivation is not so bad second time round - probably because I'm used to it! Dd2 starts each day at around 4am - I just go to bed early and it is nice to have a bit of time with her before the dd1 toddler whirlwind awakes!

It is lovely - dd2 is currently in her bouncy chair with dd1 enthusiastically bouncing her and giving her kisses.

Have fun!

Squarah Mon 01-Jun-09 15:49:18

Thanks everyone, I think I'm just finding it hard getting used to the idea of being pregnant fullstop, let alone the other implcations. I don't feel pregnant despite BFP and it's not as exciting as the first time as I know what to expect and can only really remember the frustrating bits. I guess this not being identical to last time is making me worried that it's not going to work out anyway. sad

I know I'm being a neurotic female, hopefully it's just the hormones! Did anyone else get mega-clumsy? I've dropped 2 things already today...

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