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Its no wonder new parents are so stressed when even NHS direct is doing the "rod for own back" type feedback

25 replies

AnguaVonUberwald · 11/02/2009 13:21

Honestly. I phoned NHS direct because DS 10 months old, had a temp of 39 degrees and and upset stomach.

The nurse went through lots of questions and one of them was about what he was drinking. So I said, he hasn't taken in many fluids so I have been putting some apple juice in his cup, diluted with water, to encourage him to drink, while he is ill.

And I got a lecture about how he could get used to this, and stop taking just water, etc, etc!

Honestly, I have an ill son, with Dioarreah (sp), who is not taking in much fluid. I do not want you to start lecturing me about how his life might be ruined by my attempt to get some fluid in him.

Another time they started telling me how to put on Sudocrem!

And then my MIL (who is lovely), stressing as, since DS has been ill, when he wakes up in the night for the last two nights, I have breastfed him! "Will he get used to this, start waking up for it etc"

"I DON'T KNOW, BUT I AM DOING THE BEST I CAN, QUESTIONING MY DECISIONS DOES NOT HELP!"

Sorry, rant over!

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BonsoirAnna · 11/02/2009 13:24

I'm afraid that I agree with the NHS advice not to give any kind of fruit juice. Is your DS not breastfeeding all the time? I always found that DD just wanted to breastfeed almost constantly for comfort when she was ill.

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AnguaVonUberwald · 11/02/2009 13:27

BonsoirAnna, I had started cutting down on daytime breastfeeding, but when DS was ill, I breastfed him anytime he wanted, however he is 10 months old, I am not producing that much milk anymore and I needed to get some fluids into him.

He is now back on just water in his drinking cup.

However surely when I phone because I am concerned that my son is ill, I shouldn't get a lecture on how I am trying to get fluids into him?

She was telling me to make the juice weaker and weaker to wean him off it. 1. That had occured to me. 2. I wasn't doing it for very long.

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goingtohaveagoodnightssleep · 11/02/2009 13:27

AnguaVonUberwald when my ds had an upset stomach my GP told me to give him anything he would drink , juice included as it's better than getting dehydrated.

DD1 would only dring one brand and flavour of juice for about 2 months when she was a baby but now she normally drinks water - it hasn't ruined her for life!

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WowOoo · 11/02/2009 13:27

Well, you know that some advice is just bollocks. Say to yourself that you've done the right thing.
And maybe that your MIL has a little point. Surely she's only thinking of you.

(I say that as someone who'd stopped bf at night having to do it again and wean again at night after ds was ill.) I kind of wish I hadn't but when you're worried they're not getting enough liquid, what do you do?!

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AnguaVonUberwald · 11/02/2009 13:30

goingtohaveagoodnightsleep, exactly, I just had to get some fluids in to him, I have also been told this by the GP.

Wowoo, MIL is lovely and is absolutly only concerned about me. But she has been at me to give up breastfeeding since he was 2 weeks old, and what am I meant to do when he hasn't eaten all day as he is ill and then wakes up in the night hungery.

BTW, I had cut down on daytime breastfeeding, and then when he was ill went back to it, and boy is now creating!!!

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Timeisablindguide · 11/02/2009 13:31

I was told when my ds had similar that ANY type of fluid is fine (obviously not coke etc!) so although plain water is obviously best (which you know anyway), some diluted juice isn't going to do any harm for a tempoprary period and if it means he'll take fluids when previously he wouldn't , then that can only be a good thing. It's only while he's ill, you're not planning to give him juice and never plain water for the rest of his life!

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Sunflower100 · 11/02/2009 19:55

Angua I always think that when your child is ill do whatever you need to do to get them right again - just get back to whatever routine you want (no juice, no night feeds if thats what YOU want) when they are well. Btw its only fruit juice

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JackBauer · 11/02/2009 20:29

DD1 was admitted to hospital dangerously dehydrated and all she would drink while waiting for the drip was full sugar, full strength Ribena in a carton (was stuck in A and E at short notice and that is all I could get)
was a bit embarrased and said to the docs 'she doesn't normally drink stuff like this'
'Who cares' was the reply ' She needs something liquid, that is liquid, let her drink it fgs.'

So ignore them!

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Mummywannabe · 11/02/2009 20:47

When my DS was really ill with bronchilitis and not taking any fluid all i could get him to have was sips of water. NHS direct gave me a huge lectture about how it had no calorie content (well duh ) and should be giving him dyrolyte (had already told them i had tried every variety to no effect). I cried because i thought i had got it so wrong. We ended up in hospital with him and they agreed that getting anything in him was a bonus.

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JackBauer · 12/02/2009 08:28

Ugh, don't talk to me about dioralyte. DD1 spat it back at me and DD2 threw it up every time I tried it (she had bronchiolitis too)
They say it like it is magic stuff, but it tastes foul.

If mine are bad and not drinking they get flat 7up as it tastes nice and apparerntly has salts and sugars in. But most importantly it is a special treat! (mentioned this to GP once and she said 'Well, if they drink it, why not'

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HecateQueenOfGhosts · 12/02/2009 08:32

My gp always told me to give my kids flat coke (normal not sugar free!) when they had bugs.

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tattycoram · 12/02/2009 08:36

My DS was terribly dehydrated from the norovirus when he was about 11 months (I was bf-ing him but he still ended up dehydrated and he wouldn't touch diarolyte). We ended up in A&E where they produced a large bottle of ribena and made him some, saying it was far more important that he had liquid in him than anything else.

Funnily enough he doesn't seem to like ribena now.

By the way, the blackcurrant flavoured diarolyte is VILE. I found I had more luck with the plain one.

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ComeWhineWithMe · 12/02/2009 08:41

They once asked me if I had clean towels in the house dd was ill from a vomiting bug and the nurse suggested putting a clean towel underneath her then as an afterthought "You do have clean towels don't you " .

Hope ds gets better ,I always give mine ribena when they are ill ,when they are well they only ask for water and milk .

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MarlaSinger · 12/02/2009 08:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NorksRUs · 12/02/2009 08:56

I give my dd watered down juice even when she isnt ill. Not making a rod for my own back. She doesnt have it every day and she will still drink water.

If he is ill, and that's helping him to drink, then so be it.

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Jojay · 12/02/2009 09:11

Wow, I must be a terrible mother then. DS1 has hot chocolate or strawberry nesquick to get his asthma medication in. It's the only way I can guarantee he'll take it and the risks of him not taking it are much higher.

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TheBFG · 12/02/2009 09:29

All credit to any child who will take dyrolyte. I took it once when I was ill on holiday and it is the most revolting stuff I have ever had to drink in my life, and I would never, ever try to get my child to take it.

My gp told me when ds was ill and not eating to put a bit of lemonade in water, because if they're not eating they need something to help them metabolize and to ensure the water is absorbed, so the sugar in the lemonade will do that.

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nailpolish · 12/02/2009 09:34

oh fgs its not like you are giving him neat gin

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TotalChaos · 12/02/2009 09:41

I think it's fine to recommend water over any other fluid for rehydrating, but not fine to venture into parenting advice about your child's future drinking habits!

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insertwittynicknameHERE · 12/02/2009 09:42

I don't see the problem with giving them any fluids they will take when ill.

When DD had D&V big for 2 bloody weeks the only thing she would take was fruit juice, she would not have anything else food or fluid.
I didn't care in the slightest, and was just happy that she was drinking any kind of fluid TBH.

It hasn't ruined her for life and she still prefers water for her drinks now.

Probably gonna get flamed for this, but I still let her have diluted fruit juice anyway. She has good dental hygiene' i.e, we brush her teeth twice a day.

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TheCrackFox · 12/02/2009 09:42

FFS, any type of liquid (apart from neat Gin ) helps.

If I was to ban any phrase it would be "rod for your own back" as it tends to be spouted by twats. Think your worst type of MIL.

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JackBauer · 12/02/2009 14:07

Although neat gin would work for the stressed out parent...just give the baby the tonic!

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Namechangling · 12/02/2009 17:32

Well my GP told me NOT to give just water with diarrhoea, but to give very diluted squash or similar (preferably diarolyte but obviously not easy with a baby) to get some sugar aswell as fluids in. Without salt and sugar the body will dehydrate quicker. Sugar helps the intestine to quickly absorb the fluid. You did the right thing.

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gasman · 12/02/2009 17:58

Flat coke/ lemonade is actually quite good for hydration when unwell with D&V.

I used to get gasps of horror if I recommended it in A&E though so I gave up.

Unsurprisingly kids drink it a lot better than dioralyte though.

I'm afraid I fall into the "any fluid is better than none camp"....

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AnguaVonUberwald · 12/02/2009 18:30

Thankyou all ladies for the reassurance, I also strongly feel that you just have to get fluids in them any way you can, and for NHS direct to be talking about how this could affect my son long term is totally inappropriate.

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