What age would you start Pocket Money?

[sahara]

Hi everyone. I was thinking about introducing a £5 a week pocket money for my ds1 (6yrs).
Only because I need a new way to punish him as taking the ps2, his toys, days out, internet access, treats blah, blah, blah, have all stopped getting posistive results.
What do you guys think?
Oh and any fresh ideas for discipline would be recieaved gratefully.

[acnebride]

hope someone can help with this as i'm interested, although ds is 15 months so not quite there yet.

sahara, you could try searching archived messages for 'pasta jar' as there's a brilliant discipline/pocket money hybrid system that frankly I think the original MNer who came up with it should patent (see my dh for excellent patent advice )

[roisin]

My boys get 10p per year of age. (So currently they get 50p and 70p). In addition they get extras for chores done, rewards, etc. Plus birthday/Christmas money from relatives.

I tend to get better results by 'rewarding' good behaviour (ie extra - unexpected - bonuses) rather than punishing misdemeanors (removing pocket money).

We don't exchange cash, instead it's all written in a book, and they love "saving up" for something special.

They usually spend it on Lego or books.

Personally I would have thought £5 a week is a lot for a 6 yr-old.

[Lonelymum]

To be completely frank, my mouth dropped open when I read you were thinking of giving your 6 yo £5 a week. We started our children on pocket money when they were 5 but I think that was a bit too early now. They got 50p a week. This went up to 75p after a couple of years and ds1 (8) has just had his raised to £1.

For a long time and giving and possible with-holding of pocket money was regarded with complete indifference by my children. I would say that my 8 and 7 yo would now consider the with-holding of pocket money as a punishment, but not worse than being banned from the computer!

[Tortington]

what do they get pocket money for? make them atleast do some chores - work ethic n all that.

[happymerryberries]

My 8 year old has just been 'upped' to £2 a week and she is expected to do chores to 'earn' some of that

[darlingbud]

I never got pocket money. My parents just gave me it when I needed (eg going out with friends, buying a friends b-day pressie etc)it then I wouldn't spend it on rubbish. I did have chores though even from simple things like taking the rubbish out, washing up/drying up/putting away, keepoing my bedroom tidy for a week got me a whole pound - wow!!

[jodee]

Sahara, do you give any pocketmoney at the moment, or are you thinking of jumping right in with a fiver? I have to say i'm with the others who think £5 for a 6yo is too much.

The pasta jar idea is a good one, if you haven't already introduced pocketmoney at all. If you can't find it on a search, basically you put 5 pieces of pasta in a jar on a Saturday and your child 'earns' another piece by better behaviour or helping tidy up (or whatever), and likewise can have pieces deducted for bad behaviour (I usually give a warning before removing a piece). Pieces of pasta are added up next Saturday and each piece is worth 10p. I probably haven't worded that brilliantly...

Started this recently with ds (just turned 5) and is working well.

(It was Soupy's brilliant idea, btw).

[shimmy21]

We give 10p for each year of your age as well. We find this is plenty. It concentrates the mind wonderfully when they see things in gift shops etc and want to buy them just for the hell of it but have to decide if they really want to spend their own money on it. For larger items that their pocket money wont stretch to we negotiate and will buy if we agree. In fact I find that they have almost too much money. Ds2 (6) doesn't really care if he has any money or not and ds1 (8) just spends his on sweets so I'm not keen on him having even more.
I'm shocked by how much pocket money kids seem to get these days (apparently a fiver a week is average.) What on earth do they spend it all on? My dss really don't care much about money. I think if they had more they'd not be any more grateful for it than they are for the pittance we give them!
We're sending them to the workhouse next week...

[sahara]

I don't actually give him any pocket money right now. Just read up on the pasta jar thing and will give that a go instead.
I felt that £5 was alot but wasn't sure what the right amount would be.
I'm going to try abit harder to not punish and do more rewarding but wow! it is going to be hard as he really knows how to push my buttons.
Thanks for responding, starting the pasta jar tommorrow and looking forward to it as sticker sharts don't motivate him anymore.
Do you think the pasta jar can be used to sort out his refusal to sleep at his bedtime or is it merelt rewarding chores?

[nightowl]

my friend just had the idea (after trying everything with his behaviour) to give her son little "jobs" to do. he doesnt have to do these jobs at all, but if he does he gets so much money for each one. think £5 does sound a lot for your ds age though.

[80sMum]

Please don't take offence but it sounds as though he has more than enough stuff already. £5 a week would be wasted on him. Maybe his behaviour might improve if he had fewer toys and they were more age-appropriate. Are not the playstation games intended for much older children and teenagers? The games all seem quite violent to me and playing them might wind him up and exacerbate unwanted behaviour.
A little pocket money is a good idea, providing that it's his money to do with as he wishes and also providing (very important) that you no longer provide him with things like sweets and comics yourself. Let him buy those himself with his own money - and when it's gone it's gone and he'll realise he can't have what he can't afford. Even a quite young child can learn the value of money in this way and it helps them to understand how the world works.

[RTMTMML]

We give 10p per year as well. DD2 (6) doesn't really bother about her pocket money so we just put it in a jar and take her to the toy shop occasionally. When DS1 turned 11 he negotiated an increase. He said that he didn't feel that £1.10 was a decent amount of pocket money as he couldn't really get anything with it. He'd outgrown the pocket money table in the toyshop and he couldn't afford to get a footie mag. He got £10 per month allowance which was his to do with as he wanted. The deal was that if he spent it all then it was over and no, we don't buy him what he wants. When he turned 12 it was increased to £20. With this he buys more of his own stuff. We bought all the equipment he needed for school (pencil case, pens etc) and when they need replacing then that is his responsibility. He also buys clothes etc that he wants. When we were out getting him new trainers I was only prepared to pay £30 and the ones that he wanted were £45 in the sale so he gave me the £15 from his account. He gives £2 (10%) to the local Cancer Research shop. It works for us. The money is not conditional on any chores he does around the house. He has to do those regardless.

[mumeeee]

£5 a week is a lot for a 6yr old. My 13 year old gets less then that and most of her friends only get £5. My brother gives his children 15p per year of age. We started at 6 but they got about 30p to start with.

[MumOnaMission]

Whether or not £5 is too much I think depends on what you expect him to do with it. My 4 year old dd gets about £3 depending on whether she's seen her grandparents that week and whether she has been particularly helpful but everything she gets has to be split 3 ways. One third goes into her purse to spend on whatever she wants whenever she wants. One third goes into her short term money box and one third into her long term money box for small/large things she wants to save up for. We don't buy her anything any more (except xmas and bday of course). I find if she has a very small amount to spend, the only thing she can afford is sweets which I don't really want her to buy. If she has £1, at least she can get something from the pound shop to play with.

[Frizbe]

SS is 6 and gets £1.00 per week, which encourages him to save to get what he wants!

[Kayleigh]

Ds1 is almost 7 and ds2 nearly 4. They both get £1 a week as invariably they want the same thing and we were finding that ds2 never had enough money !
They occasionally get a bonus for being extra good, or doing extra chores.

[goreousgirl]

Just started my 5 year old dd on £5 per week (£1 for every year) - Wish I'd consulted before starting - most people are horrified! My brother gives his 12 year old daughter £6 every 2 weeks! Oops!

[Kayleigh]

good grief goreousgirl, she has more disposable income than me

[goreousgirl]

I know - I feel awful now - AND I got her two magazines at Waitrose to keep her quiet today!! My reasoning was, that I was spending around £10 every 2 weeks on a new toy that she pursuaded me to buy - so I thought, If I give her the money, she can save for her own toys, and any tack that she wants to buy will come out of her savings - so it would put her off! Then I forgot and bought the magazines - agghhhh! Know what you mean - she has more Disposable income than me too!!

[MumOnaMission]

Incidentally I've just started my 33 year old on £20 per week. (dh). It's amazing how he's now stopped wanting take-aways willy-nilly and "needing" a new pair of jeans etc. Best thing I ever did.

[Kayleigh]

PMSL MumOnaMission . I think £20 is a bit steep. My dh gets £10 a week and an extra pound a night if he leaves me alone.

[MumOnaMission]

I like your style kayleigh

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