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When would you tell dd about friend's pregnancy?

(9 Posts)
JustThisTime Sat 18-Oct-08 11:24:09

My friend is pg with twins and is planning to tell our wider circle only after the 12 week scan (which is in 3 weeks). She has had 2 early miscarriages one after the other so everything is crossed for this pregnancy.

I was wondering, when would you tell your dd (she's 5.2) about the pregnancy - at the same time as everyone else or a bit later on? dd will be so excited, and I'm a bit concerned that it will be too much for my friend who will obv be on tenterhooks for pretty much the whole pregnancy. I know what it's like when everyone around you is excited & positive and you're basically just shit scared!

JustThisTime Sat 18-Oct-08 11:25:21

Ps - sorry about the name change, i can't be sure that our friends don't look on here and they know my usual name!

PenelopePitstops Sat 18-Oct-08 11:29:13

a bit later on unless she asks

JustThisTime Sat 18-Oct-08 19:18:05

Thanks PenelopePitstops

Bump for the evening.

wb Sat 18-Oct-08 19:35:42

I'd tell her when she notices, which may be a lot later than you think.

JustThisTime Sat 18-Oct-08 20:36:20

Hmm. I think I'd rather she be told properly than only get an answer/explanation when she asks. Plus, there is a big chance that our friends will be completely tactless and vocal about it in dd's presence anyway. I think it would end up feeling like one of those "Why the big secret?" sort of situations for her, iykwim. My friends are very much her friends too, she's an only child and none of that particular circle have children of their own, so we're like her peers if that makes any sense - when they visit, they play with her, rather than her & their kids going off to play (or me & my friends sitting chatting envygrin)!

Maybe I'm thinking far too much about this though! blush

lauraloola Sat 18-Oct-08 20:37:48

Is she likely to pick up on conversations about it before you tell her?

Personally I would leave it to your friend. It would be nice for her to tell her and she can choose when to x

JustThisTime Sat 18-Oct-08 20:48:05

Yes, very likely. Perhaps we've x-posted? grin

Actually asking my friend how she feels about it is probably a good idea, as long as it's not in a way that makes her feel like she ought to tell dd & worry about offending me if she doesn't want to for a while, or the other way round for that matter.

lauraloola Sat 18-Oct-08 20:49:33

I think we did smile

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