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How many 'friends' does your 20 month old have?

6 replies

Lottiebugz22 · 19/07/2020 17:16

Now I don't think this is a huge issue myself when they're so young as long as they're mixing with other children via the playground, playgroups etc. My partners friends gf who I have never taken to, we just don't have the same interests and I find her very 'I'll tell you how to parent your child the right way' attitude grating so I distanced myself from socialising with her. She has 2 friends that I know of with toddlers that she sees regularly and their children are her daughters 'little friends'. Partner was speaking to his friend about this and said that I should socialise with his gf and her daughter so my daughter can 'learn' from their daughter...as they need 'propper little friends' at this age. I have other friends with toddlers the same age who I get on really well with but they work so their toddlers go to nursery so we try and see eachother as much as we can. My daughter also has a cousin who is nearly 10 months old who she sees and then who ever she sees on the playground etc in the current circumstances as we cannot attend groups etc just yet due to covid. She very social with the other children she sees so isn't lacking in social skills what so ever. I just don't like this woman and would rather not socialise with her. It has got me wondering though if this is the norm now for toddlers to have 'solid friendships' so early on. And is our situational unusual that my daughter doesn't have this just yet? Really interested to see others opinions on this.

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OnlyFoolsnMothers · 19/07/2020 18:11

Friendships is pushing it. So my LO has friends at nursery - I see maybe at the odd bday party, 1 of those mums I like and do the odd play date with, I have 1 friend with a child and She mixes with her older cousins. My husband has kids with friends so they mix. But tbh I work full time, the nursery friends won’t last, they all go to school at diff times, the nursery is in a diff borough to our postcode. I’m not fretting about keeping friendships at this age. Just being sociable is important.

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mindutopia · 19/07/2020 20:48

At that age, they don't have 'friends'. My first had a few 'friends' that she sometimes saw only because I was friends with their mums and we happened to see each other sometimes. They had no idea who the other was or what their names were, etc. My youngest doesn't really know anyone else. He's 2.5. They really don't start to make 'friends' until closer to 4 ish.

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mindutopia · 19/07/2020 20:50

I should add that both of mine went to nursery nearly full time from 9 months. That didn't mean they had 'friends'. They mostly play alongside other children until 3-4.

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Embracelife · 19/07/2020 20:51

No they don't have actual friendships. Not at that age. Generally they get on with whichever child is around. At four yes. They can begin to have close friends.

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DanniArthur · 19/07/2020 20:54

My 2 year old has 3 friends at nursery that she talks about and we sometimes invite over for playdates. My friend also has a 3 year old son who is her best friend because they have been raised together.

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BendingSpoons · 19/07/2020 20:55

They don't have friends. They probably enjoy playing alongside other children (not WITH them until they are about 3), but as you say some friends' children, children in the park, children of different ages is fine. My DS is 17mo. He doesn't have any proper friends but enjoys his sister's company and watching other children in the park or if we meet friends (haven't really done so yet post COVID). He also enjoys playing alongside pigeons and dogs, he isn't fussy! Tbh my eldest is 4.5 and still pretty happy to socialise with whoever is around. She has friends at nursery but will be just as happy with a new child she met in the park.

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