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Baby's 2nd Christmas and ex

(8 Posts)
justanothermummy2 Sat 09-Nov-19 02:27:57

Hey everyone , if your DC wasn't going up to ex's for part of Xmas day or Boxing Day etc for various reasons would you expect him to bring presents down on Christmas Eve or would you suggest him bringing them Christmas morning so he can open them with Your child? ( I know my son is too young to even understand ) but I know ex will make a big deal of not getting to open them with DS when all his family members are present. Even though I've tried to explain that usually it's just mum/dad opening presents with the kids Christmas morning and every one of the family doesn't need to be there to witness this. Last year 14 of his family members were in and it was far too overwhelming for DS

BB081 Sat 09-Nov-19 12:45:09

You just have to do what works for you.

My sister and her husband have broke up and they have two little boys. On Christmas morning we all meet at my parents to watch the kids open their presents, have a bit breakfast and my sisters ex husband then leaves and gets them on Boxing Day.

Christmas is SO over whelming when you have a big family, so do what is best for you and your baby. The only reason we do what we do is because we’ve ALWAYS done it and it’s keeping the boys in their routine, plus they enjoy it (but they sound a little older). 14 people over is extreme, you’re right. I would just say so if you’re not happy about it.

justanothermummy2 Sat 09-Nov-19 13:59:08

@BB081 that sounds lovely for the boys and good that you all get on well enough to do that. Your right I just have to do what's best for us. As my son is just a baby I do feel last year was far to much having 14 people in on his dads side. I wouldn't have minded if it was just going to be a 1st Christmas thing ( well I did mind because it was too overwhelming for DS getting passed about constantly , but I would have let it go because it was only 1 year ) but his dad is quite demanding about all his family being there to see him at the one time and it would be the same again this year and he doesn't take into account DS feelings. Only his and his family's ( he doesn't like saying no to them ) so I'm inclined to just say no this year. DS dad can come on Christmas morning if he wants. There will be plenty of time for my son to go to his dads to see everyone else as he gets older.

BB081 Sat 09-Nov-19 14:04:19

@justanothermummy2 I totally agree, I get overwhelmed on Christmas Day with all the noise and chaos, so it will blow a babies mind! Put your foot down, and say that your ex is welcome and the rest of his family will have to wait. Good luck!

justanothermummy2 Sat 09-Nov-19 15:48:14

Bump

SylvanianFrenemies Sat 09-Nov-19 15:52:20

Could you take him over to.his Dad/dad's family? That way things might feel a bit less overwhelming.

elmosducks Sat 09-Nov-19 17:59:19

No. DC Parents only for Christmas morning. After that, everyone can do their own thing. Too much pressure on one day.

justanothermummy2 Sat 09-Nov-19 18:32:31

@SylvanianFrenemies I could do that, however I just feel like last year he was only weeks old at Christmas but this year will be even worse as id be taking DS into a situation where he doesn't know any of his fathers family or have a bond with any of them. They haven't saw him in 7 months ( their choice ) even though they all live locally. But ex feels like they all have a right and entitlement to see him at Christmas. I don't want to watch DS upset in a house full of people he's not familiar with as he has more understanding this year. But it's no doubt just going to cause an argument.

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