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Would you let 17 month old paddle in stream in woods

(27 Posts)
crokky Wed 08-Aug-07 10:31:01

From the point of view of:

young child getting cold/frightened
20 miles from my house, but near my dads
I am pg with No. 2 and feel sick and faint

My dad and stepmother treat my child as though it is their own child. They think they can do exactly as they please with him.

Am I being silly not to let him in the river at his age? I am pg and ill as well. It was supposed to be a quiet lunch at his house, but he is trying to force me to do this.

belgo Wed 08-Aug-07 10:33:43

If this was my child, I would put armbands on them, and hold onto her at all times whilst paddling. But I probably wouldn't let her do this at this age. it won't harm them to wiat until next year!

So, iiwy, I wouldn't be forced into doing this.

EscapeFrom Wed 08-Aug-07 10:33:43

IS your child cold and frightened though? Or are you just worried he will be?

FWIW worth yes I would - but that doesn't mean you have to.

WigWamBam Wed 08-Aug-07 10:34:30

I would, and I did. Dd loved it.

But they shouldn't be trying to force you into something you're clearly unhappy about.

crokky Wed 08-Aug-07 10:34:52

He used to go swimming fine every week from 6 months. The last few months, he has been cried as soon as he entered the water...that's why I think he'll be frightened in the river.

belgo Wed 08-Aug-07 10:34:53

I would cancel the whole thing if it's causing you stress. Just say you're too ill.

crokky Wed 08-Aug-07 10:38:11

belgo, that's exactly what I feel like doing. I was really ill with my first pg and it is starting again. I feel terrible! I just want to sit down and I can't see why that is so unreasonable. Plus I do think he's too young for this particular activity.

massivebigpantsface Wed 08-Aug-07 10:39:43

I would personally, but agree with the others - he is your son and you have the right to decide what he does and that should be what you feel comfortable with!

BabiesEverywhere Wed 08-Aug-07 10:40:38

You are not being silly, you are his mother and should have the last say on this. It might be a different story if your child was begging to go to the stream with his grandparents but he isn't.

Can't you suggest another activity...a gentle walk though the woods, watching DS run around a garden, paddling pool in the garden etc ?

MoosMa Wed 08-Aug-07 10:41:26

I would, but if you're feeling unwell you should say no, it's perfectly reasonable.

MoosMa Wed 08-Aug-07 10:41:41

Reasonable to say no, I mean.

Saturn74 Wed 08-Aug-07 10:42:17

He's your child.
If you feel uncomfortable with it, tell them.
And if they insist, you will have to be very clear with them.

However, if your father and stepmother took your DS for a paddle, and promised to hold on to him tightly, he might love it.

lailasmum Wed 08-Aug-07 10:44:32

I would let my child in a river and do regularly we live on dartmoor so tons of river paddling and swimming goes on here and has done since my dd was tiny, I did the same thing too when I was small, but then again you need to use you judgement if you don't feel it is safe then don't let them do it. The only thing i would say is that it is useful for little ones to get experience of being in river water as this is more likely to be the kind of place they could fall in to as an older child if they ever do, not a heated swimming pool. At least if he is under the supervision of several adults then no harm can come of him.

massivebigpantsface Wed 08-Aug-07 10:44:36

he might love it, you never know! I had dd paddling in the sea at the weekend, I thought she might be a bit scared but she loved it. I wrapped and snuggled her right up for a cuddle afterwards

Weegle Wed 08-Aug-07 10:45:29

I would but it is YOUR decision. And if you feel pants then just say you don't feel well and would rather stay put or not go out at all.

haychee Wed 08-Aug-07 10:53:14

Kids have the best time doing things they perhaps shouldnt ie getting dirty. Id let him, absolutely.

My dc are 6&4 and i made myself suffer unecessarily when dd1 was younger. Id fret about every detail that the grandparents did when she was at their house. Over time ive got used to the idea that they will be doing things that i wouldnt possibly let them do when dc go to their house. When they are there nanna and grandad are in charge.

However if your pg and not feeling well im sure they would understand if you declined personally on this occasssion. Just let ds have a paddle, if he wants to, with your dad and you sit and watch. It might actaully work in your favour and he might be more sure about water if he does have a little paddle.

belgo Wed 08-Aug-07 11:00:24

17 months is still very young. They fall over very easily at this age. You know your ds best crokky. tell your dad that next year he can take him paddling.

expatinscotland Wed 08-Aug-07 11:01:45


krang Wed 08-Aug-07 16:06:57

Yes, if adult is with him holding his hand and stream is not too fierce.

Took DS (18 months) paddling in the Chatsworth river last week. The grin nearly split his face. He adored it.

binklehasflipped Wed 08-Aug-07 16:07:19


jangly Wed 08-Aug-07 16:12:26

Leave it until next year when you're feeling fitter yourself. Depriving him of one paddle which he might or might not enjoy,. No point if it causes you distress. isn't going to hurt him

jangly Wed 08-Aug-07 16:14:16

Missed a bit out! After "...enjoy" - "isn't going to hurt him". Dur!

handlemecarefully Wed 08-Aug-07 16:16:35

Shallow stream
No strong current
Continuous supervision

Yes, why ever not?

lilymolly Wed 08-Aug-07 16:19:45

yes, but supervised, dd was in the sea last week with dog, she is 18months old and she loved it, she had sandels on her feet so her feet where protected.
That said she is very steady on her feet and has been walking for 8 months

MyTwopenceworth Wed 08-Aug-07 16:33:33

your child, your rules.

It doesn't matter who else would or who else wouldn't.

You don't want to.

Unreasonable doesn't come into it, you don't need to justify yourself to them.

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