Nursery and Settling In

[Newmother8668]

I'm just really nervous. My baby starts nursery next week. He has three days of settling in and then will be at the nursery for four days a week. Luckily, I'm now on garden leave, so I can pick him up whenever I want for the next month, so he doesn't have to do long days. He will be just a week shy of six months. How will I cope? He's so small and can't stand being away from me. Is there anything I can do when he's with me, so he feels more comfortable about it all?

[Me624]

I felt the same as you although my DS was slightly older, 10 months, when he started nursery. He's now been there for just over 2 months and is thriving. He settled in very quickly and honesrly, your DS will adapt. They told me that it's usually easier for them to settle quickly when they are doing 4 or 5 days a week, whereas it tends to be harder and take longer if they only do 1 or 2 days.

If you can pick your DS up earlier while you're on leave still that will help, the hardest thing for my DS was not sleeping as well at nursery as he does at home so he was usually exhausted when I picked him up and would fall asleep on the journey home. My DH picks him up earlier 2 days a week and those days are better. Now he's two months in, DS is sleeping much better and longer at nursery and usually manages to stay awake on the way home now even on my days.

Good luck!

[clarabellski]

You're quite lucky to be on gardening leave as we are in the second month of nursery and DS has barely managed a full week yet due to catching every infection out there....

(sorry, needed a rant, DH had to take a half day today to cover another absence, we'll have no annual leave left at this rate!)

[Hellmouth]

DS started 3 days a week at 6 months, and was doing full days from the beginning.

The nursery say he is a delight and he does seem to enjoy it. His sleep was fine in the beginning but he's becoming more inquisitive and refusing to nap at nursery!

I would say, don't worry too much. Most babies will adapt quite easily, I think. Don't let him see that you're upset when you're dropping him off, I think that helps.

[Newmother8668]

Thanks guys. I also confirmed with nursery that settling in is two weeks, so I feel better.

[babyjuststartednursery]

My DS (6.5 months) started nursery this week for settling in sessions & he starts properly next week when I go back to work.

I was concerned as this month he's started to show signs of separation anxiety but he's been amazing! He had one cry yesterday in his first session as all the kids ran up to see him at one time and today he was fine and had naps as normal. He was so settled playing today when I arrived that he smiled at me and carried on what he was doing! I was actually a bit hurt by that but had to remind myself that's testament to the staff making him feel so settled.

I'm sure you will both be fine. I've cried both times after dropping him off so hoping tomorrow is easier!

[Newmother8668]

That's testament that he knows you will be back because he knows you love him! I'll be crying a lot, I reckon.

[Me624]

I cried at both the settling in sessions my DS had. The staff told me they hardly ever see a mum who doesn't!

[Gillian1980]

Dd had a few settling in sessions then started in 3 days a week from 10 months.

She cried at drop off and pick up for quite a few weeks, but was fine throughout the rest of the day. She's been there 9 months now and loves it. She occasionally cries still at drop off or pick up but not usually.

I think it's best to give a hug and kiss and a cheerful goodbye then leave. If you look upset or drag it out it can be more distressing for them. They soon calm down once you've gone and they're enjoying an activity.

[mistermagpie]

I had the same worries, although DS was a bit older at 11 months. It was actually fine after the first couple of weeks, and tears were very rare at drop off. What was weird was that he would cry when I picked him up, but the staff said this is really common and was just because he was overwhelmed to see me!

One thing though - his sleep went up the spout for a good couple of months. I think getting used to napping in a new environment made it hard for him to sleep during the day and therefore affected his sleep at night.

Also, as pp mentioned - they catch every bug going in the first few months. DS hasn't been ill now since before Christmas (apart from a permanent snotty nose... ) but in the first few months he had something new every other week.

[Newmother8668]

Thanks guys. I've had my baby at the gym Creche for two hours a time a few times a week from when he was 6 weeks old, so he's gone through four colds already and no doubt will get more! I'll be crying a lot for the next couple of months, but I just keep telling myself that it is good for him for socialising with other kids and to be a little bit more independent. Plus, they will have a nice range of toys and activities, as I sometimes feel he's getting bored with me! :). I'm hoping the combination of his Creche experience and baby Sensory classes will help him adjust. He never cried or kicked off once when I dropped and picked him up at the Creche and I was way more chilled with it as I would just give him a quick kiss and hug and hand him over straight away.

[mistermagpie]

Yes, don't make a fuss at drop off. I don't even say goodbye really, I just leave while he's distracted and he doesn't notice. I never cried taking him but I'm hard as nails but it was an adjustment for us both. Now he's 20 months and he gets loads out of nursery, they do loads of outdoor stuff, messy play, art and face painting stuff that I would probably never do at home!