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More breastfeeding help please!

44 replies

Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 11:20

Dd2 is now 6 days old. We got off to a good start with feeding because she latched and tookcolostrum regularly from birth. We've managed to completely avoid the jaundice that was threatening to develop on day 2 and yesterday at her weigh in he had only lost 2.5% which was 3oz. We are getting plenty of wet and dirty nappies. All poop is yellow or orange and most are mustard seedy with one or two being a little more firm. Until yesterday, feeds were every 2 hours as she demanded. Yesterday she fed from 6pm until 1.30am. Every time I thought she'd finished she slept for a few minutes before crying and routing. A couple of times she let out a small cry whilst on the breast abs they both felt pretty drained. I definitely think she is windy but we struggle to get any burps up. She slept for 2 hours then had a small feed from both breasts before sleeping again for 2 more. She started to feed again about 8am and has only just stopped. About half an hour ago I handed her to dh and went and had a shower because I felt like I couldn't cope any more. My boobs feel very squishy and empty and it is difficult to express any milk. I know from my experience with dd1 that formula isn't the answer. I didn't know what I was doing with dd1. She slept for 24 hours after being born and I didn't realise I needed to wake to feed her. I missed all of the cues, tried to feed but ended up with lactation failure. I mix fed for a while but think that was too harsh on her system and she developed colic. I'm keen to avoid that this time. I would be grateful for any help or advice. If this is normal and I need to suck it up I can do that. I should also say, I think her latch is OK. My nipples are sore from the continual feeding but she is getting milk.

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YokoUhOh · 26/01/2017 11:22

It's normal- she's cluster feeding because she's having a growth spurt and boosting your supply (hence 'empty' boobs - they're not empty, they're feeding on demand). Ride it out and get your DH to look after her sister/bring snacks. Both of my DSes spent 24 hours on the boob at various points! Flowers

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YokoUhOh · 26/01/2017 11:24

Btw most babies have colic and it's nothing to do with feeding. A recent study suggests it might be related to babies transitioning from 'newborn' breathing to the type of breathing needed to talk, and excessive crying is a symptom of this. Also, Google 'purple' crying.

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YokoUhOh · 26/01/2017 11:26

This is a great website for breastfeeding queries:

//Www.kellymom.com

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TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder · 26/01/2017 11:34

Yeah this sounds pretty normal. She's cluster feeding to stimulate your body into boosting milk supply. It's bloody hard work and you'll be exhausted, but it won't last forever. I remember this being very intense in the first couple of weeks, then settling down. Then we'd have more cluster feeding any time there was a growth spurt. Check out the Kellymom website for advice, she explains it all in a really easy-to-understand way and there are lots of tips and advice.

In the meantime, get your DH to bring lots of water and snacks and make sure you've got a comfy place to feed. I made myself a little 'nest' in the bedroom and one downstairs with loads of pillows for support and magazines, phone charger, water bottles etc.

Congratulations by the way! Flowers

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TheresABluebirdOnMyShoulder · 26/01/2017 11:35

X post!

Kellymom is definitely worth a look Smile

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Heirhelp · 26/01/2017 12:17

All sounds normal. Remember your boobs don't just store milk they make it. They may feel empty but they are not.

You are doing a fantastic job. Breast feeding is hard. I did not manage it past 6 weeks.

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Mrscog · 26/01/2017 12:20

An empty boob is one which will produce milk much faster than a full one - when they're full they slow down milk production until the milk is removed. Keep going, I know it's hard but the slog should soon be behind you!

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Heirhelp · 26/01/2017 13:02

I forgot to say that lots of people successfully breast feed but are not able to express. Breast feeding requires an emotional response from you.

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GreenGoblin0 · 26/01/2017 13:10

All normal. clever baby is just getting your clever body produce the amount of milk she needs. this is just a phase and it won't last she will get into a more manageable routine soon.

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Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 14:19

Thank everyone. Dh got upset last night amd wanted to go out and buy bottles and formula. He's very supportive but I look terrible - like I've been drained - and I struggled to keep it together last night. . She keeps falling asleep on the boob but pooping so I have to change her and then we spend another hour on the boob trying to settle. The thing is, I remember how shit it was with dd. She was sensitive to lactose so formula was not good for her. Trying to get milk into her was a nightmare because she never enjoyed milk feeds and we would stress about the fact that she only take an ounce at a time when other babies her age were taking 5 or 6. I am going to face pressure from my mum and mil to do what is 'easy' but the thing is, I had such a crap experience of formula feeding last time it is making me more determined to stick with it. Id like some sleep though. Sleep would be good!

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YokoUhOh · 26/01/2017 14:29

Sleep when she sleeps - I find feeding to sleep in bed works!

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Heirhelp · 26/01/2017 14:49

You have just given birth to an tiny human so you will be exhausted. Did they hospital check your iron levels? Have you checked your temperature? Are you showing any signs of infection?

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Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 14:54

Everything was fine in terms of me. I had thrush but have treated that. I feel ok in myself apart from feeling a bit like I have a cold but the midwife yesterday said that was normal too. I've got myself some breastfeeding vitamins so hopefully that will help.

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Kiwi32 · 26/01/2017 14:56

This all sounds totally normal and like you're doing an amazing job! Do you mind me asking why you're trying to express? I find it an effort after 10 months of bf so I'd give yourself a break with that just now if you can...
would it be at all possible to get a lactation consultant to visit? Maybe have a look on la leche league? Some reassurance for you and someone to gently remind your family you're doing a great job and they need to support you, rather than second guessing you. Hang in there!

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Heirhelp · 26/01/2017 14:56

Keep an eye on that cold for me it turned into something else but I had had an EMCS.

Was it vaginal thrush? I ask as due to me to taking a very large amount of antibiotics my DD got thrush in her mouth and due to her poor latch ( tongue tie) I got thrush in my nipples.

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ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2017 15:02

Stop feeling your boobs and making assumptions based on this! It means nothing. They're not 'empty' - breasts are factories, not warehouses. The amount you can express only indicates the amount you can express, not the amount you're producing, or the amount your baby is getting. The ONLY indications you need that your milk production is fine is that her weight is on the right track (which you say it is) and that she's producing wet and dirty nappies (which you say she is). Those are the ONLY two things that indicate anything about your milk production.

Now this:

Yesterday she fed from 6pm until 1.30am. Every time I thought she'd finished she slept for a few minutes before crying and routing

Yes, she's cluster feeding (totally normal) but what we're you doing when you thought she'd finished? Putting her in a cot? If so, that's why she's waking up and rooting. I'm guessing she would stay fast asleep for a lot longer if you didn't put her down. If I'm guessing correctly, this is where safe co-sleeping and feeding lying down will get you more sleep. Feed her to sleep in situ, lying on the bed next to you, so the movement to the cot doesn't wake her, then lie down next to her, remaining in contact with her. She should stay asleep for longer periods.

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savagehk · 26/01/2017 15:05

Keep your fluids up. If oh wants to help send him to get high calorie foods for you to snack on (cake!!). From my personal experience expect to do nothing but feed baby for first two weeks, it gets much easier after that. Good luck and keep going Flowers

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savagehk · 26/01/2017 15:07

And another recommendation for safe co sleeping. Only possible issue with her so young is checking her latch.

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Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 15:18

We are safe Cosleeping. I'm using a sleepyhead mattress in our bed. It is helping. Yesterday when I tried to put her down in actually put her on dh. The previous two night she had slept on dh whilst I slept. The idea as that they have a bit of bonding time. Last night she just wouldn't settle on dh at all and wouldn't settle on me either. She just wanted boob.

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ElphabaTheGreen · 26/01/2017 15:21

To put her on the Sleepyhead or your DH, though, you are moving her and separating her from you. Are you able to feed lying down so that there is no need to move her? That was the only thing that worked with either of my DSs - any attempt to move them once asleep, even if it was inches away from me, made their eyes ping open and rooting and wailing begin.

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Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 15:44

I struggle with latching lying down. She's got a tiny mouth and I've got large nipples so she latches best when I'm upright. When I'm lying down her hands get in the way and she keeps sticking them in instead of the nipple!. I think its something we just need to work on.

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Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 15:51

It was vaginal thrush. The hospital said it was unlikely dd would get it but I'll keep an eye out.

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GreenGoblin0 · 26/01/2017 18:33

Op you are doing really well. Your DP and DM really need to be on board though. one of the most important things when establishing BF is that the other adults around you are supportive. Suggesting formula when it's not what you want but you are tired and emotional really isn't helpful.

If you can get to 6 weeks you will find things so much easier. one tip I was given was to mark 6 weeks on your calendar aim for that as your target. each week will get easier although in between you might have little blips like you are having now but stay focused on that 6 week target. it's lovely that your DP wants to bond but I think the PP was right about putting baby to sleep on your DP in between feeds at this stage she needs to be close to you at all times esp when cluster feeding at night. dad will have plenty of time to bond for now it really is about you and baby.

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Whatsername17 · 26/01/2017 19:24

Thank you for all of the messages. Dh is very supportive he just panics I think. The soreness is easing up but my nipples are a little tingly and I can almost feel.the milk pouring out of me so whatever she was doing last night is clearly working.

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GreenGoblin0 · 26/01/2017 21:43

really sounds like it's working. didn't mean to sound so critical of your DP sure he's doing a good job and it is hard when they feel helpless but he just needs to keep looking after you and supporting you eat and rest when you can.

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