I apologise if this is the wrong place to post.
I am 30 next year and have an 18 month old dd. We were fortunate to conceive quickly and have an easy pregnancy and birth (although a 3rd deg tear)
I love my little girl to pieces and have always dreamed/imagined I'd be a parent of 2. When growing up all I wanted to be was a SAHM I think because my mum was until I went to secondary school when she returned to train as a teacher.
However I have found being a parent really hard, harder than I thought and sometimes I'm not sure if I'm good enough to ever have another.
My husband is a teacher so is often busy and a huge amount of childcare and housework is on my shoulders. I work full time and my daughter is in nursery for long hours (7:30-5:30 mon-thurs, 7:30-3 fri)
I find life hectic and difficult and sometimes feel quite low about it. My parents and sister live far away and dhs parents are happy to help financially but rarely look after dd even if it's so we can do a big clean of the house. They have never and I expect will never change her nappy and have refused to have her overnight until she always sleeps through.
I know lots of people don't have someone who would take their child overnight but I know my parents would occasionally if we needed a break, but being so far from any emotional/physical support means I feel we never have a break (before anyone asks no we can't move closer to them as dh has written off the idea for numerous valid reasons)
I have started to dream of preparing for that 2nd child although have only been at a new job for 3 months and will wait until I've completed my 6 month probation at least (although I am not particularly happy in the job so wonder if I should try and find a new one and get that probation over with before ttc)
However without much support I feel I will be incapable of looking after another child. My parents are even visiting this weekend to help look after dd so we can do a spring clean as I feel that life has got on top of me.
I have to shower, clean, prep the next nights tea when dd goes to bed as otherwise I don't have the time, how would I fit these things in with a baby too without some extra help?
Does this mean I can't have another baby? I dont think our situation will ever change and I'd rather not have a huge gap between kids.
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I don't know if I'm a good enough parent to have another child
11 replies
Roxie85 · 07/06/2015 08:12
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