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Parenting

Can't work out crys

18 replies

SharonGarry · 26/11/2014 12:35

Hi my son is 3 months and I still don't know his crys he is bottled feed now as struggled with breast feeding I'm trying to feed every 3 hours but I'm not knowing if he crying for food or not anyone else had this

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NessaYork · 26/11/2014 12:38

At that age it will be either:
hungry
windy
sleepy
too hot
too cold
nappy needs changing
bored
in actual pain

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Shelduck · 26/11/2014 12:40

Sounds very normal to me! If he cries, offer a feed first, then try everything else! You will spend a lot of time making up bottles that you then throw away, but his feeds will gradually get more predictable, i promise.

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SharonGarry · 26/11/2014 12:43

Ok thank you

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BarbarianMum · 26/11/2014 12:57

I think being able to tell what's wrong with a baby by the ound of it's cries is one of the great mothering myths tbh

I just had a mental check list like Nessa and worked my way down it. Usually that would sort it but sometimes they just - cried.

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SharonGarry · 26/11/2014 13:45

Yeah I've been told by a few mums they never worked out crys just makes you feel bad when u can't work it out I'm keeping feed to every 3 hour though I try to distracted him until than as want to try keep feeds to routines

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BuilderMammy · 26/11/2014 13:47

Yes, we had a mental checklist too. They definitely only had one cry for everything! Having a routine made it easier as we generally had some idea whether they were likely to be hungry or overtired or whatever.

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naturalbaby · 26/11/2014 13:48

I struggled to figure it out too. I used to stick his hand or my finger in his mouth to see if he was hungry. I also started with a vague sleep routing at this age and figured out he needed to be winding down or settling down for a sleep about 20-30mins before he needed to be asleep. I just focused on food and sleep at this age!

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FourthMary · 26/11/2014 13:50

I never figured out cries either, they all sounded the same to me. Just keep doing what you're doing and it's gets easier in time.

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moomin35 · 26/11/2014 14:23

Google this:
kemh.health.wa.gov.au/services/breastfeeding/feeding-cues.htm

It's a poster that I found really helpful in the early days :-)

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PurpleStripedSock · 26/11/2014 14:29

I beat myself up over not being able to recognise crys as apparently it was something you were supposed to be able to tune into as a natural mother... bunkum.

My child used the same cry for months and months for whatever was ailing her and it wasn't until much later in her life that there became nuances between hungry/tired/pain. The tired one was the first one that stood out because it was recognisably more whingy but your child and your experience with your child may differ.

For me it was a matter of, the baby was crying, it must be hungry - feed it. If that didn't work, then it was down through the check list, change the nappy, rub/pat the back, put it to sleep etc. Good luck.

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KatyN · 26/11/2014 14:34

My son was bottle fed every 3 hours from about 3months (before that we fed on demand) and it meant he pretty much never cried because he was hungry.
The only way I could interpret cries was by eliminating things through his routine (regular naps, regular nappies, loads of bottles). It took us ages to fathom the cold cry though!
K

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squizita · 26/11/2014 16:34

I can distinguish pain/wind - its a high harsh cry and i do a good wind and take her temp in case of poorliness - other than that I try: nappy, food, comfort/nap in that order. She usually cheers up with those 3! Grin

I think all these people who claim to know exactly what baby is thinking just fuel mummy guilt.
let's face it ... We don't always know what adults who can talk, write and text are thinking. Babies have quite simple basic needs: if you just run through fulfilling them baby will be happy.

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squizita · 26/11/2014 16:37

...and I look at the eyes for tiredness and the mouth (suck motion, open mouth while staring at me!) For hunger. DH sticks a clean pinky finger in her mouth and if she sucks hard it's breast or bottle time!

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SharonGarry · 26/11/2014 19:47

Thank you for all your messages I'm grateful for all your advice :)

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Trooperslane · 26/11/2014 20:02

The only one I worked out was hunger sounded like a cough.

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jessplussomeonenew · 29/11/2014 10:23

My baby is the same age and I also can't tell cries apart, but I find his body language much easier to read and better because it sometimes helps me pick up what he needs before he gets distressed.

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Highlove · 29/11/2014 11:33

Another one who couldn't work out what cries meant at three months. Felt like a terrible mother as a result. At nine months I can recognise some but I certainly don't always know what's wrong. As PPs have said, go through the mental checklist and don't beat yourself up.

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TheGirlAtTheRockShow · 29/11/2014 16:05

DD is 5 months old - I still have no clue what her cries mean!
I can sometimes get a clue from body language, but not not always. For instance she'll be crying and rubbing eyes, so must be tired. But no - wants feed first.
Chewing on hands used to be a sure fire hunger sign but that doesn't count any more.
Just trial and error every time.

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