Things I have cried about today...

[louloutheshamed]

Ds2 is 5 days old. I remember the weepy days with ds1 but for some reason I didn't think it would be as bad this time, but if anything it's worse. In the past 24 hours i have cried because:

1. I'm worried how on earth I'm going to cope with 2 dcs once dh goes back to work, esp as I am recovering from an emcs.
2. The trauma caused to my body by emcs and what happened leading up to it (whole other thread) and my disappointment in my body as I had a vaginal delivery with ds1.
3. Not being able to pick up ds1 at all or even cuddle him without flinching. It breaks my heart.
4. Realising how big he is and how quickly he has grown up. Remembering him as a new born...
5. Realising that while I'll have time with ds2 to myself when ds1 goes to nursery, i won't have that with ds1 for a long time, at least until ds2 is no longer bf.
6. Thinking that after the delivery I had there's no way I could ever go through it again, and so ds2 will probably be my last child and I didn't appreciate being pregnant enough I just moaned about it, when really I should have savoured every kick.
7. Being in pain from engorgement and a cracked nipple- I had this the last time and even though I eventually fed ds1 for 18m I found the early weeks v sore. Stupidly I thought I'd be better at it 2nd time around.

Amongst other things...

The enormity of having a 2nd child has just hit me, even though I've had 9m to prepare. Is this normal or am I being ridiculously self indulgent??

[AnyaKnowIt]

No words of wisdom, I've only got the one but go easy on yourself

[AndAnother]

Normal [tea]

[TooTabooToBoo]

I just read through your post nodding along. DS is 6 months, the early days (elcs, post op infection and establishing BF) were hard and full of guilt for DD (who's 9 yo), fear of the reality of juggling 2 and general anxiety. Also after a hideously painful pregnancy the knowledge that he's my last baby and a weird grief for the end of my child bearing days Lol!

It didn't last long, I made sure I spoke about it to my closest people and made a deal, having suffered with severe depression before, to go to the GP if I didn't start feeling better.

Think of all the hormones bouncing around your body right now, 5 days is a drop in the ocean. Be kind to yourself, rest, eat enough and drink plenty (I felt my symptoms of anxiety worsened if I hadn't drank enough)

Oh and congratulations!

[Pajimjams]

Oh Blimey I think day five was the absolute worst day! Cried on and off about all sorts for a little while after that too! Just remember this is how it's supposed to be- your hormones are all over the place and its completely overwhelming.

Look after yourself! And make sure others do too- you are recovering from major surgery.

Congratulations btw!

[Dirtymistress]

Totally normal! I cried every day for the first six weeks when ds2 was born! Especially when dp went back to work 4 days after the birth, leaving me with a newborn and a pissed off 17 month old.

[cupcake78]

Yes yes yes! I was a puddle of emotional turmoil for about 6 weeks after having both ds and dd!

All normal hormonal madness!

[JimmyCorkhill]

I'm 6 months in. It's sooo different now. You will be fine

[Notsoyummymummy1]

A lot of the things you are upset about are about not meeting your own expectations and you need to learn to adjust your expectations, get all the help you can and just take each day as it comes. You are putting far too much pressure

[Notsoyummymummy1]

On yourself xxx

[TheCountessOlenska]

I felt awful for the first two months at least with both children. I remember this time weeping after a visit from family because they all made a fuss of baby DS and I felt my beautiful big girl was being overlooked (I'm pretty sure most of this was in my head!). I was just heartbroken for her. Six months on it's all forgotten, she loves her baby brother and I adore having both of them for whole minutes at a time
Poor you though, hope you start feeling a bit better soon