Please can some better parents help me re TV(20 Posts)
DS (21 mo) gets up at 7 ish. We're normally done with breakfast by 7.30. So what do other parents do between breakfast finishing and getting dressed and sorted for the day. Because in this house we normally sit and watch CBeebies for 40 mins ish. DS just isn't that interested in playing or reading books in the morning.
Similarly when I need to get dinner ready in the evening. I feel like I have no choice but to stick the tv on again so I can cook - otherwise he just whinges around my feet, or tries to pull me away from the oven.
So - what do better parents do? Or should I just stop demonising the TV and embrace it? I should also add that I'm pregnant and can therefore only see my reliance on tv increasing in the coming months...
I used the TV an awful lot when my DD was little, but I tried to make sure I turned it off at about 9am and would put it back on for 1630 so I could make tea. It was also my friend when I was pregnant and in the early days with DS when I needed to feed him etc. Personally I don't feel it has stunted her development.
We don't have as much TV nowadays due to the fact that my children play together in the morning and since she has started school it is harder to fit it in, so things change.
I think so long as you are providing you little one with other entertainment throughout the rest of the day a little TV is fine - don't beat yourself up.
After breakfast I take DD (14mo) up to the bathroom and she either runs to the bath or shower. I then fill bath for her or we have a shower together (she seems to like sitting by the plughole and splashing for the moment). I have a CD of bearable nursery rhymes that I put on, which helps while I get dried she can dance or clap. Means that we are both 1 step closer to getting ready for the day. I go out every day though, unless one of us is v. ill. Even just sticking her in the trike and taking a bag of jars/bottles up to the bottle bank. I live alone and find it v. hard to think of things to do with her alone everyday. Going out is by far the best option, plus yr house won't be as messy as if you had stayed in. I get to meet other adults at various groups and if all else fails I walk 30mins to the nearest park (Sunday=lonely for me) and chat to a few other parents while she runs about like a lunatic.
We still do a couple of Peppa Pigs before bed on Youtube though, and I'm sure as she gets older demands for more will increase
If I tell you, I don't want any accusations of being a smug mother of a girl!
I don't have the early morning period anymore, but when I did I used to just get dressed and take her out for coffee. I couldn't stand that early morning waiting for the day to start period.
At tea time, I used to turn her high chair round and put her in it so she could see me making the tea. Now I sometimes let her up on a stool to "help" - with most things she can't help so I give her something of her own to do. She will also sit on the kitchen floor playing with saucepans and a bag of macaroni (which I have sacrificed to this purpose - I'm never going to cook it!)
DS is 13mo so a bit younger, but I did the same with 5yo dd. In a morning we do a million and one things. We have music or the radio on and dance around, I blow bubbles for him to pop, he stands on a chair and helps me wash up, he empties 'his cupboard' (full of safe, dried goods, boxes and packets) and then stuffs everything back in again, he empties the dvds out of the chest and er, stuffs them back in again. A duster or a broom go down well in a morning too. He has had severe separation anxiety up until now and he's currently happy to potter. It's a real novelty for him.
He helps me cook dinner too. Either standing on a chair if I'm doing prep or in his highchair if I'm doing anything hot. He has his own mini cooking set and joins in with great enthusiasm but only if in the mood. Actually tbh, I don't cook dinner that often in the evening as his tolerance for it isn't brilliant. I tend to do it during the day while he's happy so make things like a lasagne or pie which can be put in the oven later or I use that early morning slot to put things in the slow cooker. He really likes doing the veg prep and throwing it in the crock pot.
I agree with getting out and about too. ASAP usually.
And the odd bit of television while you're pregnant is fine. I do think you can get stuck in a rut with it though. We have a no television on weekdays rule and the odd dvd only at weekends. It's surprising how little you miss it tbh.
We get dressed immediately after breakfast.
I avoid cooking in the evenings with the two kids. I do it early afternoon.
That time when you are watching morning tv we are dancing like loonies to CDs
At tea time everything gets taken out of all the kitchen cupboards while I do whatever needs to be done and do my best to ignore all the whinging and grizzling.
I find tv incredibly tedious, rarely watch it and so it never really occurs to me as an option.
We have the BBC news on in the morning - I just can't face kiddie TV before 9.30am ;)
HOWEVER, on mornings when DH isn't around, then I may well put some CBeebies on for 30 minutes whilst I run around like a maniac. Some times it just helps a lot... Same if DS is really under the weather - he just doesn't want to do anything (very rare, fortunately!)
In the evenings we have Disney Jnr on between either 5pm when we get home (if it is after 5pm - we got back from the park at 6pm this evening). It stays on until bath time at 7.30pm, then we switch to normal TV...
However DS rarely actually sits there and watchs anything (apart from maybe Curious George or the Num Tums...) and it is on in the background. Plus we are out and about so much and do somany activities, that I am happy that he has a very well balanced life.
nowt wrong if you want the child to be still and not underfoot whilst cooking supper, and to entertain whilst dealing with new baby
on all the time, as moving wallpaper ain't so good imo; tele is an essentially passive activity (if you can call it that)
Why not get dressed and ready earlier?
I would aim not to have the TV on at all for a child under 2, unless they were sick.
Don't be so hard on yourself, you seem like a perfectly normal parent to me.
My DC are now a bit older and tv is used to bribe them into doing what they need to do as quickly as possible. So, in the mornings, once they have had breakfast, washed dressed teeth cleaned, hair done, then they can watch some tv before going out of the door. After school, if they get changed quickly enough, then they get to watch tv for a while.
We don't have TV at all and don't miss it. If it's not on, then they will do other things. Breakfast is normally done by 6.15 and then just whatever - this morning both DCs sat on the side to help DH make his sandwiches, then they went into the living room and played with Mr Potato Head for a bit, then DS went to help DH shave while I got DD dressed. I had a shower while DH got DS dressed. DH left at 7.05 and then I sorted laundry, tidied up etc while DCs amused themselves until mindee arrived at 8. Snack at 8.30 then all in the buggy to take DD to nursery school at 8.45.
In the afternoon they're often in the garden and I do some cooking prep then. Their supper takes ten minutes at about 5.15 then DH takes them upstairs for teeth and stories while I cook our supper.
we have the TV on a fair bit. DCs are 3 and 17m. Not before 7.30 (and given that they are usually up at 6 that's not bad. 30 mins downstairs for brek, then they come up while DP and I shower. he leaves for work and I get them dressed after me. Then teeth and wash for them THEN the TV goes on for about 45 mins while I get packed lunch ready, put washing on etc. They play around while it is on then we leave for pre-school. DS is there every morning and on the two afternoons he is with me I often do have it on in the background and he dips in and out. I disagree that its passive - he has learnt numbers, colours, shapes etc from watching - we dance to the tunes and he participates in the ones that ask for that. It goes off about 4.30 and we play a bit, then I do dinner while they run in and out of the garden or sit up with books. bath, maybe the 6pm Peppa Pigs then reading and bed.
Watching with interest.
OP - i'm having the same issues with my 22mo DS. Usually in the past i was able to get up and get myself ready before DS woke up at about 7.30. Lately he's waking much earlier and the only way i can keep him occupied is to put the TV on for a while. As MrsCF has said though, we try to limit it to literally 20 mins in the morning and don't allow it to go on again until 5pm. Easy on a normal working day, but not so easy at weekends!
We never have tv on in mornings. We get dressed before breakfast. Eat breakfast, do hair, get bags ready , Washing machine, dishwasher etc. While an doing this dcs can draw, colour, play etc .
Get out a couple toys ready the night before and chat to child whilst getting ready. They don't need tv on!
At 21 mo i'd be surprised if drawing and colouring would hold attention for longer than a few minutes givemeaclue. My DS just doesn't 'get' drawing yet, he'd rather be climbing. And running. Similarly, he's bored of all his toys and would much prefer to 'play' with real things which is, quite frankly, dangerous especially if our attention is elsewhere. I'm sure when he's older he'll draw, colour, read and play imaginatively, but at that age you're a bit stuck if you have a very active, inquisitive child who is into literally everything.
Matana - exactly the same here!
I do talk to him whilst we're getting ready, I do have a cupboard in the kitchen for him and play things, I do rotate toys - he just will not keep his interest in them for more than 5 min max.
We get up around 7.30am. They play in bathroom or come in bath whilst we take turns showering. Then they play in our bedroom/ look at books whilst we get ready and they are wrapped in towel/ in pjs.
Then get them dressed/ teeth/ nappy etc sorted. We don't attempt to go downstairs until this is all done so around 8.30am. Then breakfast. They eat then play with play dough/ draw etc at table whilst breakfast cleared away etc ( age 1 and 2, youngest in highchair so can't escape!)
Finally ready for the day around 9, and they play with toys a bit whilst I get pram/ drinks/ nappy bag sorted and we aim to leave house around half 9. We v v rarely stay in as it drives me slightly bonkers!
On mornings we stay in they play a bit, then we might try baking/ cooking together , or get paints/ arty bits out. They nap after lunch.
What I used to do when mine were that age , into everything etc was gave a room in Tim house that was very safe, nothing to break or pull over , for me it was the playroom, lots of toys ,does not how uch mess made, stair gate on door and I could quickly get bags, buggy etc together whilst they were playin there. Is that an option? Story cds also good, or music. Nothing wrong with tv an only suggestingas you asked what other people do.
Join the discussion
Please login first.