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Hello, i'm a thread virgin

(18 Posts)
milliemayhem Sat 18-Oct-08 12:09:05

Hello, i'm brand new to all this. Just wanted to introduce myself. I've got a 5 year old son, split from his dad when i was 3 months preg, met a new partner a year ago, who is moving in with DS and me this weekend!!! Its always been just me and my DS, don't really want anymore children, and am finding this going from 2 to 3 member of family v v hard. Its not gonna be only me and my baby anymore, i feel like i'm losing him in a way. Thou DS can't wait for BF to move in. Any advice? Thanks

2childrenandit Sat 18-Oct-08 12:29:55

Didnt want this thread to go unanswered - welcome to MN - a very interesting place!! Hope all goes well this weekend - imagine adjusting to something like this will take time and look forward to 'seeing' you on other threads soon!

teafortwo Sat 18-Oct-08 21:01:10

Hello milliemayhem!

Life sounds good for you right now! And it soulds like it is just about to get a whole lot better!!! You have found a man who loves you, who you love and who DS thinks is just great!!! - You should write a book about your life - it would be a best seller!

Here is a little story you might like. It is a story about me...

When I moved in with DH, four years into our relationship, I was pregnant with dd and because he lives in France I had to 'give up' my old life to embark on our family life. I was all smiles and happy when I said bye to all my work friends, family and old friends. Got on the Eurostar, walked through the front door of our apartment and burst into tears!!!! Since that night - I have been living here very happily for 3yrs this April! Honestly, it has been the happiest three years of my life! I have been more careful to keep loved ones close to me and have completely fallen in love with family life and Paris with all her charms!

It is a different story from yours - but has the same vibe... because I think even when you are making a change for the better it is normal to feel a bit sad for the life you are leaving behind. Please don't panic - the good things from your old life will stay with you... like me somehow, you will make sure of it.

I had a practical thought - What about making sure you have one day or even one evening just for milliemayem and ds time? Some place or something just for you two to do together?

Welcome to mn - grin

milliemayhem Sat 18-Oct-08 22:57:18

Thanks for replying to my message, its nice to know someone out there in the big wide world is listening! Anyway, all is resolved, i had a cry into the boyfriends shoulder (whilst standing in the middle of the pavement with a bag of wet washing in hand on the way to launderette!) and he understands how i feel. Helped him move all his gear in, luckily hes spent most of his years travelling and his life is in 3 holdalls! (Doing this thread on mobi so have to open a new page, bear with me)

milliemayhem Sat 18-Oct-08 23:02:42

Writing this message on my mobile, so you may need to read the one below first! Annnyway, all is good here for moment. I know they'll be teething probs, but we'll sort them. Just gotta get used to body hair on the sheets and work boots outside door! Lucky you Tea, for being over the water in france. BF took me to paris for 30th bday last weekend. We've fallen in love with city. Hopefully taking the mini one over next year, would love for in to see the place. Esp the double decker trains! How mad are they!

teafortwo Sun 19-Oct-08 10:42:08

Milliemayhem - I am glad the two of you had a good chat!

Good luck and enjoy your new life! smile

twinsetandpearls Sun 19-Oct-08 10:43:24

hello, good luck with your partner moving in. How exciting.

squeaver Sun 19-Oct-08 11:15:27

Millie - just wanted to add that change is always difficult but it sounds like your dp is great. Take deep breaths and take it one day at a time. Before you know it, it'll be like he's always been there.

<<quick hijack for TFT>> Was in Paris Friday and yesterday!! Did some top shopping in Le Marais>

teafortwo Sun 19-Oct-08 11:24:47

OH MY GOD SQUEAVER - you should have told me -we could have met up. Oh how we would have drunk real champagne and worn real hats - I think berets would have been the perfect choice! Don't you?

milliemayhem Sun 19-Oct-08 12:05:11

We found a litte place near to Lourve called Chez Claude and drank real mojitos and laughed our bums off. I want to go back :-( Beats the school run and cleaning the kitchen floor.

teafortwo Sun 19-Oct-08 14:02:25

I will look out for chez Claude next time I am around that area and think of you milliemayhem. You must have felt like Hemmingway drinking mojitos in Paris!

So have you found a place for all dps stuff yet?

We had the task of turning our apartment from a bachelor pad into a family home..! It took us... urmmm actually we are still working towards it now!!! Ha ha ha!!!!!

ClosedForCleaning Sun 19-Oct-08 14:21:15

Hello and welcome. I'm just passing as I now realise I mis-read your thread title.

(Thought it was an "I'm a virgin" thread. Was going to ask all the virgin mothers to get back in their boxes as it's not even November yet).

teafortwo Sun 19-Oct-08 16:11:01

Closedforcleaning - that is so so funny!!!!

Hey, I was thinking, milliemayhem... my dh bought me this film as a little present lately...

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Man_and_a_Woman

It is just lovely, maybe you know it? It is about love and some of it is set in Paris... I have been watching it over and over I am watching it now as I make mayonnaise!!!! There is something very special about it. It is sad and touching but, I think, optomistic in the end. It would be a perfect film to snuggle upto and watch in your first days of living together - especially as you were in Paris so recently!!! smile

squeaver Sun 19-Oct-08 19:59:02

Sorry - TFT been out all day.

I did think of you, but was with my bf who had a STRICT ITINERARY of shops to visit. My God, it was hectic, my feet were aching.

Next time, I promise. J'adore Paris!

teafortwo Sun 19-Oct-08 20:02:27

Oh don't worry Squeaver - we will always have Paris! Ha ha ha!!!!

Mulanmum Mon 20-Oct-08 05:15:04

envy at teafortwo living in Paris!

Welcome Milliemayhem (love your name!) and good luck with your partner moving in. Think TFT's idea of mum and DS time is lovely. Does DS think of your partner as dad? It might be nice to let them have some Dad and lad time too. My DH loves having the occasional day when he has DD to himself.

milliemayhem Tue 21-Oct-08 08:28:14

Well thanks for ur replies. All is going good at the mo, only thing i'm struggling with is the early morning wake up calls- he has to get up at 4...! I'm gonna make sure i spend alone time with DS and DP will spend time alone to, as i work alot of evenings and weekends. Thanks to all who replied. Watch this space for the first big argument about the dishes!

teafortwo Tue 21-Oct-08 09:45:53

milliemayhem - you know what we find we need too.... alone time for dh and teafortwo.

Luckily we have the most lovely childminder! Sometimes we organise that 'dd is invited to hers to have a sleep over party' wink. We drop her off "Have fun darling - we will miss you lots!" Then we catch the metro into Paris and just have a blast - two lovers and a beautiful city - the World is ours and ours alone... we walk back to the rising sun!!!! (I have never found the 'walk of shame' very shameful - it is lovely to watch the city beginning a new day, with sleepy party eyes and a whole night of fun and laughter still pumping through my blood). Actually - we don't do it enough - and it is important. This is because otherwise you will get bogged down in arguements over who broke the shower curtain, uuurrrmmm....why isn't the milk in the fridge and where are my pants?????

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