Triplet mum in need of help urgently

[2tontess]

Hi, I'm writing on behalf of my friend who has 6 month old triplets and is reaching the end of her tether.

Friend is married, also has 11 year old DD. DH currently works double shifts to keep the finances flowing, understanably he's pretty shattered and not able to contribute much in terms of care and attention, Dd is also great help but she is still a child herself and is also in school everyday.

The babies sleep all night but not much in the day and my friend is worn out, to top it off she broke her wrist last night

Have any other triplet mums had help with the general logistics of day to day life? If so, in what shape or form has this been achieved?

The area in which she lives is currently unable to provide any assistance unless the children are listed as 'children in need' with social services, my friend is keen to avoid this. Nearby schools/colleges have now stopped using local families for childcare students. Her HV has also looked into organisations but there is nothing nearby - it's a continuous case of banging on brick walls.

We live half hour away and I have 2dc myself (3 & 1.5) and my husband is away so I can't do as much as I would like. When my husband gets home we will be having the babies for at least a day (not giving friend a choice on this!) but that won't be for another fortnight, she really needs some regular help a couple of times a week.

Anybody have any suggestions/experiences they can share?

[tvaerialmagpiebin]

No Surestart volunteer near you? That is the first thing I thought of. Erm...... no local family? Maybe TAMBA might help?

Only have 1 dc but have friend with 2 year old twins and 9 month ds so can imagine....

[Egg]

hi i have ds1 who is 3.5 and 20 month old twins and i got help from homestart via my health visitor. This was because i called hv in tears when it all got too much this time last year. Triplets must be such hard work and esp now she has broken wrist i am sure she must qualify for help. Can she contact homestart directly ?

Am pretty sure her children ARE children in need if she only has use of one hand and is on her own all day. I dont think it means they will be thought of as 'at risk' just that they need some help.

Whereabouts does she live?

[accessorizequeen]

I think she ought to contact TAMBA, that's exactly what they're there for. They will have a good network and perhaps a fund for emergencies like this one. Homestart also a must if they have volunteers in her area? I have a homestart volunteer and she's a real help although I am lucky enough to have some paid help at present. God, poor lady, really feel for her!

[hutton]

Hi i have 6 month triplets and a 3 yr old. i get help from home care 1 hr mon-fri house work and private carer one hr 2 days a wk 2 help with feeds when my husband works. I got it through my health visitor i think it might be because i have 4 kids under school age. Worth asking, if no joy try the doctor.

Hope this helps

[Raeray]

Where does your friend live? There may be someone local on here who may be able to help whether that be a nanny for paid work or maybe just for a good ref for triplet experience, a broody mum etc..might be worth a shot. If she's in or near London I would help out!
Def also try homestart they're brilliant and there is a website; www.home-start.org.uk

[galaxymummy]

2ton your local health visitor may have a nursery nurse attached to the team or a local childrens centre may have fsupervised playworker sessions
if she has pnd it may be easier to get help
put notice up in school as kids often look for work experience for duke of edinburgh schemes 1-2 hours after school contact local scouts guides church etc
ask local twins club for buddy help
maybe local mum with older kids could help
galaxy
ps I think would be useful to let mumsnetters know what part of countryyour friend is in so that they could offer help
ps ring tamba twinline
08001380509

[frakula]

If she's anywhere near me I'd offer to help (unpaid) for triplet experience! Am a nanny...