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A little cry and comfort needed

(4 Posts)
xkatyx Sat 18-Jun-11 18:57:48

Hello everyone,

I'm currently pregnant with twins so will be baby 4/5 was a complete shock as we were using contraceptives.

I have ds 8, dd 5, and a baby 5 months old.

Today I feel like crying as I'm so scared, my baby isn't sleeping through yet we have tried everything from controlled crying to bringing her in bed the lot! Anyway this wouldn't bother me apart from the fact these two babies will most properly be here in 5 months and I'm freaking out. How am I going to cope if she still wants feeding then?

Plus the last month or so she has gone from the most happiest baby ever to a bit of a crier. I love my kids to bits I wouldn't have them any other way I'm just really really scared how I am going to manage.

Dh said we should go out for a meal tom for fathers day but I know she will properly have a good old cry the whole time we are out.

Sorry for the whinge i just don't really know where else to go with it, dh is fab and just Sais we will be fine and how exciting it is.

MamaChocoholic Sat 18-Jun-11 20:02:30

It will be hard work, especially those first 6 months. but you've got older children so you know your 5 month old will become more independent soon, that the crying is just a(nother) phase, and that you will survive and look back on it with triumph rose tinted memories.

I do sympathise. we were terrified at the thought of twins when our only other child was 2. I did find the first few months really hard work physically, and I didn't get to enjoy the newborn stage as I did with ds1. but the dts are 8 months now, and I can cope just fine with them. everything got easier around 6 months when they could sit up and play on their own more. now I sit them opposite each other and they make each other laugh (can't do that with a singleton!) while I go mn clean or something.

my friend's mum had a 2 year old and a newborn when she got pregnant for a third time. she didn't know it was twins till she gave birth. she said she doesn't remember much from the twins' first year but those kids all grew up happy and she's still around to tell the stories smile

I'm trying to say (badly) that you will be able to do this. and the three of them will be lucky to have each other so close in age to grow up with. but for a while it may seem overwhelming and that's totally normal. what help can you get? have a look for homestart in your area. find your local twins group. and have a sneaky small wine

jen80 Sat 18-Jun-11 22:12:03

Hi xkatyx I have twins and a 3 year old.

My twins are 10 months old, the age your baby will be when your twins arrive. Don't forget how much babies change in just a few months. Your baby will hopefully be sleeping through, will be able to play, feed herself finger food (a bowl of sweetcorn will keep mine occupied for ages!) and will be able to hold her own bottles if you are formula feeding.

Do you have a local college with a childcare course? When my babies were 3 weeks old I had help from a student 4 days a week for about 8 weeks (for her work experience) she spent a lot of time sat next to me on the sofa while I was in a complete daze but it was brilliant help with the babies and also to play with DS1.

Could you have a picnic (quick trip to M&S food hall!!) or something similar tomorrow instead so you don't feel uncomfortable if she cries?

Could your baby be teething? Mine seem to cry for a week or two then a tooth appears and theyr're happy again.

Don't be hard on yourself it's normal to feel overwhelmed by the thought of two babies. I try really hard not to put too much pressure on myself to do too much every day but it's hard when you have older children who you have to consider. You will find ways of working that suit you as you go along, you will figure it out.

Oh and a Jumperoo works wonders keeping one baby happy / still while you deal with another!

xkatyx Sun 19-Jun-11 18:51:58

Thank you so much for the advice, I feel alot more positive today I really appreciate the support thank you.

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