I miscarried my first pregnancy at 11 weeks 2 days ago. Everything had been fine the week before at our private scan. Everything developing as it should with a good healthy heartbeat.
I had been spotting brown blood for 2 weeks. Just after my scan it started turning to red brown clots and then bleeding. I cramped pretty much all day for 4 days until it reached its peak on Thursday when the pain became unbearable. Fearing the worst but unsure of what was happening I asked my partner to call 111 for advice. I passed the foetus whilst he was on the phone. The pain instantly stopped.
The first thing I'm finding hard to deal with is how it happened. It was all so undignified. I had a bowel movement just before passing the foetus and although I had flushed in between, the remains got flushed down the toilet 😔. I feel horrible for this. Like I took away baby's dignity and just flushed it down the loo. At the time so much was happening and we weren't thinking straight. I don't know what we would have done differently had we of retrieved it but the way it happened just doesn't feel right.
I've read that miscarriage pain can be likened to that of early labour. It has not detoured me from wanting to try again when we're ready but after experiencing the pain I wonder how I would cope. It only lasted for about 10 minutes at most and I did not know what to do with myself. The sweat was pouring off of me and I felt crippled by the pain. I could barely speak. Does anyone have any words of advice/encouragement? This process has been so much tougher than we expected it to be.
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Miscarriage/pregnancy loss
Miscarriage at 11 weeks. Very upset with myself.
9 replies
IfeelFloopy · 07/10/2017 18:34
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