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19 years old and feeling really depressed after a miscarriage

(5 Posts)
delaniejohnson Sun 09-Jul-17 05:15:51

Hi everyone. I found out I was pregnant in March, and I had no intentions of keeping the baby. I used contraception and just got unlucky. But after my boyfriend (who I've been with for 4 years) and I went to my OBGYN appointment and heard the heartbeat, we had a change of heart and decided to keep our baby. I was still really nervous about the whole situation because I'm completely financially independent and have no familial support, but we were determined to make it work and start a family.

I miscarried at around 12 weeks, which was around the time I started telling people since we were supposed to be safe by then. It's been 7 weeks since then and every day is worse than before and I don't know how to break out of this depression. There are times when I feel like maybe this was for the best because I'm so young and I have the rest of my life ahead of me to have a family with my boyfriend, but I feel so horrible for thinking that. I was so unhappy and nervous about my pregnancy and then right when I began getting excited about being a mother, I lost the baby. It almost feels like karma.

If anyone has suggestions about what I should do or how I can move past this, I'd really appreciate it. Thank you.

DownUdderer Sun 09-Jul-17 05:21:51

I'm really sorry to read your news, it's such a sad loose for you both. I've not got any advice for you. Is there a helpline that you could phone, have a google and see if you can find one.

barkisworsethanmybite Sun 09-Jul-17 05:29:00

Hi x I have been there x I lost my first st around the same time. Oh and I were having problems and I had taken the morning after pill and then found out it hadn't worked. Given the issues i thought about not keeping the baby but when we went to the appointment neither of us wanted to go through with a termination. I found out at our 2 week scan and was utterly heartbroken. I felt it was karma.

It wasn't karma and it isn't for you either. It will take time for you to heal and come to terms with this. It's a big deal. Others will say unhelpful things and it will hurt for a long time but I promise things will get easier x x x

barkisworsethanmybite Sun 09-Jul-17 05:29:53

12 week scan not 2 week scan!

delaniejohnson Sun 09-Jul-17 21:26:20

@DownUdderer Thank you for your kind words, I haven't thought about that, I'll check it out.

@barkisworsethanmybite I'm sorry you had to go through this too sad It's really relieving to hear that other women have gone through this exact same scenario and ultimately it's gotten better. Thank you so much for your reply.

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