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I think the loneliness is starting to make me go slightly nuts

(10 Posts)
NervousNutty Sun 21-Jun-09 13:52:13

It is all I can think about and has made me cry more times in the past week than ever before.

Doesn't matter what I do to make myself forget about it, it's still there.

ChasingSquirrels Sun 21-Jun-09 15:10:27

Nutty, I really feel for you - but you need to start getting out and forming a circle of people around you. Your loneliness isn't going to go away on it's own - you need to do something about it.

It doesn't have to be massive, small baby steps, one at a time.
Find something you enjoy doing, start to do it more.

I shouldn't be advising, I haven't got that many friends (2 really good ones who would do anything for me, and a handful of school mums who would probably help if I asked and they could - but who aren't really people I feel I could call on) and I am often lonely. I'm also not in an emotional place to be advising anyone today.

Am going back in the garden to take out more of my tension on the poor plants I am pruning, in the hope that I will have worked some of it off by the time the boys get home.

Take care.

bettyboo26 Sun 21-Jun-09 15:10:59


I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so low.

I have taken to going to the gym a few nights a week just to get out of the house and try to meet up with other mummy friends on my days off work just for some adult company.

Weekend are harder though when others are busy with their families/husbands etc.

Could you try either of these? I swear they keep me sane(ish)! smile

CarGirl Sun 21-Jun-09 15:49:59

I wonder if it's because of what your ex is up to at the moment? I agree though baby steps, going out and getting more contact with other adults.

Is there anything going on locally you could go along to?

NervousNutty Sun 21-Jun-09 16:02:47

Oh I couldn't care less what xp is up to anymore tbh.

I do have a couple of friends but they have their own very busy lives and so I only see them occasionally and that's fine.

I am having driving lesson so to make it easier for me to get out and about and do things but I can't afford anything like gym membership or similar.

I am just not the type of person people make friends with, and thats not meant to sound as 'poor me' as it does, it's just a fact.

Anyway, it wasn't really friends I was on about.

CarGirl Sun 21-Jun-09 20:34:39

well I was meaning more friends/socialising and getting back on the scene as well tbh!

Being lonely is horrible sad

NervousNutty Sun 21-Jun-09 20:36:28

It is yes.

Perhaps it will be better once I pass my test and I have the option of just jumping in the car and ging whereever i fancy smile

chattysoul Sat 11-Jul-09 05:22:25

Know what you mean about loneliness nervousnutty, I have a car but as I can hardly afford to put petrol in it/run it right now/everything a struggle financially despite getting maintenance and the correct entitlements, I hate going out with Joshua on our own I just don't see why I should bother much unless it is nearby. Luckily though we have some scenic places hearby.

Last year I wanted to take us out and about but the weather was diabolical. This year I just can't be bothered to go far on our own I feel too exhausted as I sleep appallingly badly. I do the essentials each day and then try and rest as much as possible.

chattysoul x

chattysoul Sat 11-Jul-09 05:24:35

One more thing I just think it is hard to make new friends the older people get unless you join a group or something.

It is not a very friendly country, England! Only superficially. It strikes me people just can't be bothered they are too 'busy being boring' to quote my work colleague's expression!

Oh well gotta live somewhere eh.

chattysoul x

Amy99 Tue 14-Jul-09 14:06:51

Hey nutty,

I know exactly where you are at with the loneliness. I'm lonely al the time too.

My ex made me and our 3yr odl son homeless in february (he assualted me very badly and not the first time either), so I had him arrested and cos the house was in his name (Even though I paid just as much towards it) the police made me leave!!!

After nearly 6 long and extremely hard going mths, im actually no further to moving on, getting my own life back together, making new friends, or having a better relationship with my child - to the point where I have even considered going back to a man who stashed 20 kilos of drugs in our attic, was dealing, doing cocaine, and smoking pot, being physically very violent, and cheating on me......

I suppose I cant make any friends because I am too ashamed of whats happened and people knowing or asking questions about why Im always on crutches, its become too frightening to socialise cos im paranoid all the new people I meet will just be like all the people who I knew for the last 10 yrs and not one has stopped to ask if Im ok cos they are all too busy sucking up to the ex to buy drugs off him!!!!!! Nice!

Im pissed off that now I have such a mountain to climb to make myself feel happier and confident again, and it would be hard enough to do without a 3yr old in tow, but now I feel like all I have got is my little boy and keeping him happy cos my life is essentially over at 27.

I really hope that you feel better soon and if you ever need to rant about the idiot ex be my guest, I will rant with you

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