GRRRRRR....XP has really pushed my buttons today!!!

[Janos]

I am just so, angry with XP today.

I've forgiven him a lot of things on the basis that he is a good father even though he was bloody awful to be with (too many issues to list here)

But sometimes, just sometimes he REALLY gets to me. And today was one of those days.

We share custody 50/50. DS is with me Sun-Wed, XP Thur-Sat

Anyway he leaves a message last night telling mhe is worried about DS and he will take him to the doctor. OK, so I do (probably over protective) mum thing of worrying and stressing about by little boy, is he OK? So I left several messages today for XP, can you let me know DS is, when he is going to docs. Nothing, not a thing all day to let me know how DS is until I send a final message.

He didn't bother taking DS to doctors. Kept him at home all day, did not bother telling nursery he wasn't coming in. So it will fall to me to sort it out as per usual

Me all day getting more and more worried.

God I know lots of you will be reading and thinking what's so bad about that you daft woman? And I KNOW there are much worse X's on here, believe me! It's difficult to explain..there is a pattern of dismissing, patronising, emotionally abusive behaviour but it's just made me AAAAARRRGGGHHH today.

In fact I was so upset I snapped at a colleague (inmmediately apologised) which is just not like me at all so I feel bad about that too....

I'm not even sure what the point of this post is but I feeling a little better for putting it all down.

God sometimes I could cheerfully strangle him. Of course I wouldn't ever but...YKWIM. Thanks for listening.

(NB this has been posted twice..forgot to put a title on the other thread!)

[Skramble]

I know how you feel, as I say its always something, sometimes its so tiny and insignificant but it gets my back up enough for that little thread of stress that festers and brings me down again.

I just keep saying "tiny little insignificant things don't matter when I have the big wide world" along with some deep breathing and remind my self thats why I am better without him.

[Janos]

You're right Skramble, normally I would just write it off but today it is for some reason really got to me.

THhankfully nursery are aware of what he is like after several years of dealing with him.

He is just selfish, rude, inconsiderate....

Time to step away I think and try to chill out. DS is OK (well not 100% ok just a bit poorly)and that is what matters.

[Janos]

Soz for awful typing btw.

[Skramble]

I wonder if it will get any easier but after another week of unclear arrangements and minimal communication I wonder. Hasn't seen them all week but still only having them for half a day this weekend, never feels like he has to make an effort or go out of his way, but thats how it always was, Hey ho just keep telling yourself you are a better person.

[Janos]

Yes communication seems to be a big issue with my XP too. I would have been happy with a text saying 'DS is fine, will keep you updated' or something similar. No big phone call needed or anything.

It's just so frustrating isn't it!

Normally I'm just to XP and his 'ways' so just allow for it and it doesn't bother me (too much ) but yesterday was just one of those days.

Feeling much calmer today though as I have a rare day off.