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he s letting her down again!!!! is there anything i can do

5 replies

hayley2u · 19/08/2008 11:17

i split with my ex p about 3 months ago, we have started a pattern he has her , two saturdays , one weekend he does not see her and the other weekend he has her from friday till sunday. when i went away last month for weekend he did not pick her up from my parents house, just left them with baby for whole weekend, now i am going away this weekend, and he has sdudenly text saying he is working in scotland and wont be home till late friday, he knows i am going away i have tried speaking to im he says there is nothing he can do. i have told him i am away and said if get someone to watch her till he gets back will he come straight for her, he said no as he ll be too late by then, so bascically he saying he s not getting her, i think he s lying about being away just cant be arsed having her, is ther anything i can do to stop him from doing this, he just lets her down all the time. this can not be fair on baby i know she s too young to understand but wont have my kids getting messed around

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HumphreyHassock · 19/08/2008 11:20

I don't blame you!
Surely if he's working, it's up to him to arrange alternative childcare for your DD?
Could you formalise the arrangement?
Maybe see a solicitor, or speak to CAB.
I hope you get it sorted soon.

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hayley2u · 19/08/2008 11:29

i am absolutly fuming with him he just text me that i am mad woman, i really dont care just need him to relise it s his kid

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HonoriaGlossop · 19/08/2008 12:08

I'd re-arrange with a whole lot less contact. Maybe one afternoon per weekend and see how reliable he is with that. He's clearly not going to be reliable with the whole weekend things so start off with much much less and see if he can build up.

I agree with speaking to a solicitor or CAB just to ensure you know your rights, etc. But I have to say I would do EVERYTHING to avoid going down that road; if you possibly can do this amicably between you, that is so much better than going down the legal route IMO. Obviously there is a place for the legal route if necessary.

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MUMDONEGOOD · 19/08/2008 12:39

I'M NEW TO THIS SO BE GENTLE. Split up with my ex seven years ago when my daughter was two. For the last few years he has been twice a week to see her. Not taking her out but sitting round mine. We moved recently and he said he was homeless and could I put him up temporarily which I agreed. Its history repeating itself. Found out he has got a girlfriend (whilst fooling around with me in bed) and may be getting married. I am devastated. He never spent time with us on weekends as such but insisted we go swimming every sunday as a family. His actions weren't always confirming what his words said. I threw him out last week and he hasn't contacted his daughter, she is older now and is missing him terribly. What can I do? I am crying all the time as well.

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MUMDONEGOOD · 19/08/2008 12:50

Sorry re: previous message realised how it works.

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