Mystified at what must go through his head

[CrackerOfNuts]

Last week I informed xp that he was no longer allowed to contact me via phone unless the dc were with him, and that I now had a phone and number specifically for this, and this would only be on when the kids were with him, and no other time.

This was all because he had been harrassing me etc, and so I have told him I want nothing more to do with him at all, unless it is to do with the children, no phonecalls, no hanging out of his living room window offering me tea when I walk past, and no coming into my home.

Anyway, he is due to collect the kids from school today as they are going to his for their tea, so I switch the phone on to txt him and make sure he has remembered, and find 3 txts that he has sent.

Text 1 - A joke
Text 2 - A I am so sorry if I ever caused you any sorrow etc etc pile of bollocks
Text 3 - Teling me that he was having a cheese sandwich and pickled onions for lunch.

I don't get it, I really don't. How much clearer could I be ??

I txt him about collecting the kids and he replied saying yes he was collectig them and then a load of waffle about his carpets and his grown up dd.

I replied 'drop them back at 6'

How long do you reckon it will be before he gets the message ?

[hertsnessex]

oh dear, sounds a sad situation. at least he isnt being abusive, but i know it cant be a comfortable situation. i think you have done the right thing by not getting into a conversation with him and just been to the point. i am sure he will get the message soon!

xx

[OverMyDeadBody]

A couple of years probably?

Maybe he's deliberately doing it because he knows you don't want him to see he's seeing how much it takes before you 'crack'. Good for you for not responding, I'd just ignore it, don't let on that you even read the other texts.

[CrackerOfNuts]

Oh no i didn't let on i'd read them.

He asked me a question in his reply and it was not dc related so I ignored it.

[kay7]

You got one of those have you?I had the same thing,i cracked after a year,went back,biggest mistake of my life.Some people just dont get it.It can b really annoying.best of luck, and dont you dare let him crack you.

[Freckle]

Maybe he won't ever "get it", but if you carry on ignoring his continued attempts to continue a relationship with you at least you know you aren't encouraging him at all.

[barnstaple]

Just don't respond to the irrelevant ones; you have ignored them so far and that is absolutely the right thing to do. Well done.

If you're lucky he'll get fed up with sending stupid msgs about sandwiches etc and give up.

[allgonebellyup]

does he still love you??

[CrackerOfNuts]

Yep he does bellyup, and whilst I know that it must then be hard for him, I have to say I am way past caring about his feelings and just want him to leave me alone.

[madamez]

You are doing the right thing by ignoring all texts that aren't relevant, and it does sound as though he is a loser rather than an abuser, but if there is any agression in any of his attempts to maintain contact with you,make a note of it and maybe report him if he continues after you have clearly told him not to contact you with regard to anything other than your children. Sometimes prats like this do become aggressive in an attention-seeking way, but a lot of the time they will persist in this low-level harassment which is more like playground teasing than anything else (how long can I keep annoying her till she loses her temper).

[allgonebellyup]

oh god he sounds like me.
i text my ex all the time (well i did a couple of months ago) and just used to ignore it, which wound me up even more!
He also says he doesnt care about my feelings and just wants me to leave him alone! (which i have done now)

[allgonebellyup]

he just used to ignore it

[littlewoman]

It will probably stop when he finds another woman. He sounds obsessive.