Single parent again- breakup of 4 years !!

[lilyrayne]

Together 3 years didn't live together, both have children from previous relationships.
Things haven't been great for months, I've had anxiety for years which has been hard for him as he couldn't really be there for me or even bother to understand.
He has had a lot of stress from work, ex's etc.
Few months ago I found he was messaging a old work colleague arranging to meet up for a meal. Swore blind just friends blah blah no other evidence of anything else. I forgave him moved on. Not long after tho he started to pull away saying he was depressed and stressed etc and he isn't good for anyone etc I supported him been best I could be for him. Then after a while of pulling away , Asked if he still loved me says not sure. Now I've seen him once in a few weeks and after that one visit thought things were getting back on track and then he disappeared again then said he wanted to come over and talk a few nights ago and then calls me and says he can't it's work etc so I say I can't live this way anymore and he says he doesn't know what he wants anymore which I know means me. So the few things he had at mine are now back at his and he's blocked. The pain is unreal.
I believe it was someone else possibly, I am up at 3am as I can't sleep and I'm not eating Just on pissing Xmas eve. I feel heartbroken, truly thought he would never give up even when it got tough. What a joke, I just want to cry n hide but I can't for my children.

[BillHadersNewWife]

What an arsehole! Either way, you're best shut of him. Who needs someone like that in their lives who thinks it's acceptable to do this right on Christmas!

[lifeisgoodagain]

. Hugs

[unicornsarereal72]

Shit timing. You know this will pass do the best you can for the next few days. Allow yourself to be sad. And let people support you. 2020 will be a better year

[carly2803]

what shit timing.

trust me though, it does get better - single mum here and owning it.

its hard but look for the positives