First time posting. Since I became a single mum I have become a bit of a hermit. Ex was a gambling alcoholic and after 15 years I left him. I have two children and it's been a real struggle to cope alone but I feel like I'm finally getting there. During my divorce I was so miserable I couldn't bare to have happy conversations or pretend everything was ok so avoided people. In turn, friends have dropped off. My neighbours happily chat/gossip with each other and I hate having even the briefest chat because their lives just seem so different to mine. They are mostly families, doing fun things all the time, going on holidays and my life just seems shit in comparison. Same with all the smug school mums. I'm finding that avoiding happy couples means I am avoiding nearly everyone I used to know! I can't help it. It's coming up to 2 years of my divorce and I am feeling lonelier than ever and feeling a bit sorry for myself, thinking why me?! I don't want to be a hermit forever and I used to enjoy going out. How do I get out of this cycle? My two best friend live miles away unfortunately and I don't know any other single mums in this area. How do you cope with communicating with others (especially happy families) when you are doing it all alone and feeling exhausted most of the time?
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