I know people say that the evenings are the hardest when you have no adult conversation. I have never once struggled with that. I finish what I need to go after my DDs bedtime then invariably chat to a friend or watch a box set in bed. Lovely. But my hardest time is when it's holidays. I've just come back from a few days away staying with family and in a B&B at the seaside. I stood holding their coats watching them on arcade games and rides, and smiling and waving at them, feeling so shit and empty and trying to hold back tears. Trying to sound together and cheery but feeling so alone. Their dad cheated on me so we split 2 years ago. I'm still processing this and they are too... they're still very emotional about it. I love them more than life itself, and they're fantastic people but the weight of what I've done by having kids is enormous... now I have to raise them by myself. I'm so worried about so many things... climate change a major one and what their future will be. When we're out of our routine, I lose my confidence and feel like I'm not enough. It's as if the expectations of free time being fun is all hanging off me and I wilt under the pressure.
Anyone relate?
Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.
Lone parents
I struggle the most when it's half term/summer holidays
namechangedbutneedadvice · 17/04/2019 18:38
Op, i’m on my own too. It’s hard work.
I split things into those I can do something about - diet exercise, general happiness, and those I can’t - climate change etc. (and yes I know I can do my part)
Your phrase “what you’ve done” in having children - every time you hear them laugh or excitedly discover something new, you should know you’ve done the right thing. You haven’t done anything wrong. Just raise them to be optimistic and considerate, and enjoy their laughter.
You can’t take the world’s problems on your shoulders, they don’t belong there and anyway they would pull you under. You are still getting over the break-up, cut yourself a little slack. 
I'm in a similar boat OP. I try and do nice things with them but it's hard not having another adult there to share those moments. Mind you my ex used to stress me out so much I'm actually enjoying those trips slightly more than i did with him. Which is something. 
It's a good point about spending time with other adults... I think I need to balance just being the 3 of us with bigger family breaks.
My ex used to stress me out too, another good point! Some things are definitely easier without him.
They are currently in my front garden doing a lemonade stand... love em 
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.