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URGENT ADVICE NEEDED RE EX ON DRUGS IN FRONT OF MY SON(4 Posts)
Sorry for caps in the title - i really am desperate for advice. DS (13 SN) has just returned from his Dads and has told me that last night his Dad was "twitching and jerking his arms and legs", "his talking was weird and funny" and "he was shouting about someone hating him but couldnt hear who". DS was obviously scared and said he wanted to call an ambulance but couldnt find the phone. I know XH smokes pot but I wasn't aware he did in front of DS and this sounds like more than pot to me anyway. I know I need to do something today but I dont know what to do or who to talk to.
For background, XH is controlling and abusive (mentally and emotionally but not physically) and I am very scared of him if I'm honest. He is currently spreading rumours about me and trying to turn my family and friends against me. He is also spreading lies and rumours about my new partner and I know he will deny any of this and put it down to me being crazy (what he generally tries to get people to believe). He also tells people that I am an alcoholic and I care more about my next drink than i do about my son. This is relevant as I know this is what he will tell social services if they get involved. He doesnt care about DS welfare, only about hurting me.
Sorry this is long and rambly, I'm panicking and not wanting to drip feed. Please help.
I would contact social services, surely they can drug test him. He shouldn't be around your son.
Definitely sounds like more than weed...to be honest you ds is at an age where he can decide if he wants to see his dad, I would definitely put the option to him, if its disturbed him enough he can choose not to go. Also have a chat with him about drug use, just because its worried him this time doesn't mean it always will. Prevention is better than cure in these instances.
If your xh kicks up a fuss, be brutally honest about what ds has reported back to you and tell him his child has decided he doesn't want to have contact there's not a lot he can do about it...
And regarding the alcoholism comment, your DP can vouch for you and I'm sure you have plenty of friends and family willing to stand up to him on your behalf! If the social do get involved I'm sure both of you would get tested as part of standard procedure. The only difference is you'd come out clean and he'd be dragging his own name through the mud.
Thanks. Have contacted NSPCC today who are going to speak to me again tomorrow and if necessary contact children's services and anyone else needed.
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