How long would you except to be with a new DP before you would leave them alone with your DC?

[Fink]

Just asking because I am single and intend to remain that way so I have no real idea of what's reasonable in terms of progress of a relationship.

I found out last night (he mentioned it in passing) that ex-h was leaving dd with his dp while he went out for an hour around bedtime. I've met the gf several times and she seems fine (she also works in a job where I would think she would have a dbs check), but I was still a bit shocked that he would leave his child solely in her care.

At what stage of a relationship would you think it was appropriate to leave your kids with a new partner?

[exexpat]

If she's a responsible adult, that sounds no different from leaving them with any normal babysitter, tbh.

[yellowband]

For me I was very cautious, DH didn't spend time alone with my DD until after we were married and living together (so after 5 years of being in a relationship). That wasn't about safety fears (he has a DBS check for work as well and is great with kids), but more about having strict boundaries (wanted him to be a partner for me rather than a convenient child minder).

If it was just about the safety aspect, I think I would still have waited a couple of years before leaving them alone together. I didn't even introduce them until I'd been with DH for a year.