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Involuntary Celibacy... The Horror!

(3 Posts)
namechangingmonkey Thu 08-Jan-15 20:09:54

Dear All,

I have come on here with a courageous name change to announce that I, namechangingmonkey, have not had sex for THIRTEEN YEARS.

J*sus.

I thought it was ten.

THIRTEEN YEARS!!!!!!

Dear God.

The last time was with a man, my then boyfriend, who said, I love you but then left me soon after. It was actually pretty good.

Then...I was depressed for a year or two.

And then I had my children in rapid succession (without having sex - I'm a single woman by donor sperm choice)

And since then, other than one revisit with my exes hands down my pants a few years ago (and no repeat: he's married)

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING

How can this be?

Fifteen years ago I was at it five times a day with a boyfriend.

Now I am a born again virgin.

There is NO SEX IN MY LIFE.

This is an outrage.

I don't suppose anyone else out there can come anywhere near this horror.
And I've probably sent the horrors up those of you who have recently turned single.

Dear Lord.

THIRTEEN YEARS.

Help!

(Incidentally the worst time was when I was pregnant. I was desperate, aching for sex. And... nothing. The closest I got was a vibrator, which I threw away after my cleaner found it in the bed and left it positioned in the middle of my pillow).

HOW CAN IT HAVE COME TO THIS???????????????????

tickertyboo Thu 08-Jan-15 22:59:22

No sex for for four years (and counting) following the birth of my little boy. I got stuck climbing over a friend's stair gate last week; I informed her that it was the only thing I straddled these days. More than happy with this state of affairs.

To tell the truth, I'm a bit windy of men. Life is very peaceful without shagging.

warmleatherette Thu 08-Jan-15 23:33:08

Same here. It's been three and a bit years and it doesn't bother me in the slightest. In fact I like feeling that my body is my own, inviolable, for the first time since my late teens. The highs of love, sex and snogging don't seem worth the lows - the time wasted attaining fuckability mandates (shaving legs, waxing pubes, putting on make-up etc), the insecurity of wondering whether you're 'good enough', the pain of being cheated on, not to mention the continual risk of pregnancy (NEVER. AGAIN) or thrush or whatever. Having to be nice to some dickhead who lies in bed while you make him endless cups of tea in an attempt to nicely rouse him so that he might do a tiny bit of childcare or housework. Boring blow jobs - I'm sure the reason my jaw clicks these days is because I was so keen to be a good, giving and game blow-job provider for a sociopathic wanker who couldn't even be bothered to go down on me.

In theory I feel your pain namechangingmonkey but seriously, if you think about it - don't you think you're better off without it?

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