first overnight contact

[confusedNC]

'd'h ended marriage few weeks ago. He's been pretty selfish, nasty and unnecessarily threatening court, suing me for divorce within couple days etc

Anyway,I want ds,3 yr old, to have contact. I've been in bits about us splitting for his sake.

I've agreed to overnight with dh in hotel nearby. I can't sleep though.

Dh sent really weird text earlier. Sounds like he's drunk. He's not a drinker though so I'm confused.

I've just ignored it but it's bothering me. Guess it's just the first of many. Any words of wisdom?

[BobPatandIgglePiggle]

He's drunk in a hotel room with your child? I'd go get the child. Ring the hotel and ask them to go and check on them.

[LadySybilLikesCake]

I'm with Bob. Go and get your child.

[BobPatandIgglePiggle]

What did the text say??

[confusedNC]

I can't say for sure that he was drunk from text. It would be out of character. It was just nonsensical. Asked me about some words ds was saying that h couldn't make out, which is ok, but then said something like ' I did naughty thing couple times. Ds didn't. He just went on swings.'

As I say just weird. Horrible new world of these visits. :( ds back lunchtime.

[MuttonCadet]

That is a weird message. Have you had communication since? Given it's the first contact night I think you'd be fine to call him up and see how the night went.

[confusedNC]

No nothing. I'll be getting him back by lunchtime. I could text I guess just not sure how that will go down. Maybe I'm too soft.

[JabberJabberJay]

Do you think your DS is safe with your ex? If not, then I would not allow contact- especially overnight.

Why is he staying in a hotel room anyway? Does he not have his own home?

I am also a lone parent. My ex and I are not on particularly good terms but I have always been confident that he will take good care of our 2 DCs.

[confusedNC]

Temporarily I'm staying with family who are a long way from family home. H is living there and isn't making effort to leave so ds and I can return yet. The split is v recent.

H loves ds no doubt but I have some concerns in terms of him being adult enough to look after him properly. I'm keen though for ds to see him and feel that h will never man up if I don't let him take responsibility.

I guess I'll see how this time has gone. Would you ask about text?

[confusedNC]

Figured it out. He's referring to stuff ds said as if ds been naughty but hadn't been. Badly written text but relieved! Stress making me twitchy.