I have changed my nickname just in case ExP is checking as he knows I use mumsnet a lot.
I am considering going in to court to ask sole parental responsability. I am not doing it because I think DD is in danger when she is with her dad. She loves him to bits and so does him which makes this desicion even harder. The problem is that after my maternity leave ended ExP and I decided that it was best if I would give up my job to look after the little one. Almost two years after we separated so at the moment I am claming JSA contribution based. This week I have discovered that I have been denied Housing and Council Tax benefit on the grounds that I have not right to reside in the UK. I am from abroad but European Citizen. They say that I have not worked the minimum years needed to be entittle to the benefits. So in a few words, I am stuck in England (I don't mean it in a bad way ), not getting any help from family because they don't live in England and ExP won't give me consent to go back to Spain which I can understand.
When we separated it never crossed my mind to go back to my country because I always thought that it was best for my DD to be close to his dad. I even rented a house 3 minutes walk from her dad so she would be close to him and would know the area. In theory he should pay me off my part of the property we bought together but he strongly believes that morally I am not entitle to anything from the house because I have never paid the mortgage even though I always paid the bills and the food, he is a tight ass. He used to pay me £200 per months after my maternity paid finished and he call it pin money. He even checked my bank statement to see how I was spending the money. He has kept the house and all the furniture we BOTH bought together. He is not paying full child maintenance because we have not reached a separation agreeement so already owns me money from the child maintenance. I have enough money to pay another two months of rent but after that I cannot afford to pay rent or council tax with the benefits I am getting. He has never bother asking me how we are managing, I have explained to him twice the situation DD and I are in and he doesn't give a f**k (excuse my french). So what do I have left? I do not know what else to do but for sure I do not want to end homeless with DD and I do not want to give him full parental responsability. He is a control freak and has made my life misserable for very long time. Just a shame I didn't see it before we had DD, I am so angry with myself for that . How have I been so stupid all this years?
Anyway, I am not asking you to tell me what to do but to tell me your opinion and what are my chances of getting sole parental responsability giving my situation so I could go back to my country and get all the support from my family and friends.
Does anyone know what can happen in court? What should I expect? How does it work? I would like to know from your experience so I can decide what is best for DD and myself.
Sorry for long post but I really need all you help again
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Sole parenal responsability, advice needed. Please help. A bit long sorry
15 replies
itsnotpossibleisit · 16/07/2011 19:51
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