Not a LP anymore but could do with advice about dealing with xh

[nymphadora]

All fairly amicable & we get on ok so reluctant to rock the boat BUT lots of things niggling at the moment. Am worried if I bring up one then I'll rant

Will be vague but any suggestions of priorities for me to discuss with him would be helpful

Dd2 has a couple of problems we have input from medical professionals for. They say be consistent and suggest xyz. I do xyz and xh does xya or xyc. Nothing that will make her ill but may delay sorting the problem

Dd1 (10)had Xmas money they used to buy clothes for her with which was ok if they hadn't bought stuff she already had. Especially when she does need new clothes. She also likes to be involved in buying her own clothes.

They always come back shattered on a sun night & go straight to bed but still tired in the morning after late nights at his.

We are quite flexible about swapping days/weekends for special events/occasions but he has ended up with part of 5 in a row and we had to rearrange a huge family do as he double booked them(after being told months ago)

He always promises money for school trips & tells them but doesn't get round to it. In the past this hasn't been a problem as we could afford it but dh isn't working now & I'm on maternity leave so money is getting tighter.

These are the main ones anyway. Any suggestions how to broach it too please.

[outnumbered2to1]

i would reckon that your DD2 medical issues would be first on the list. Especially when medical professionals are telling you what to do and when and XH is doing it his own way....

[bobala]

Have to say I always broach issues via email first with my ex as he is very aggressive and any attempt at a discussion ends up with him yelling. That way I can get my point across and also there is no way he can get away with saying I havent mentioned things, another favourite trick of his. The medical stuff and the tiredness would be my start as his weekends are affecting them at school on a Monday morning?

[nymphadora]

He doesn't do email!

The issues aren't medical but are having medical advice.

Thanks it's winding me up cos the niggles are mounting up. He probably has niggles about us too