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This board is primarily for parents of LGBTQ+ children to share personal experiences and advice. Others are welcome to post but please be respectful that this is a supportive space.

LGBT children

What would you do?

5 replies

Rosebud2005 · 29/11/2020 20:43

Ds, just turned 15 got a present from his best friend along with other stuff... the biggest rainbow flag you’ve ever seen. She’s expecting him to put it up in his room. I have told him it’s up to him if he feels he wants to put it up however: he’s said himself he’s not sure. He’s said he’s not the type to put it out there yet. He’s happy himself and becoming more confident although still not at the point where he’s told any other family yet. Would you have allowed something like this to be put up on the wall or is it too much? How should he feel about it? I feel he’s worried what others will think. As always I have told him it’s his life and up to him what he wants to do x

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formerbabe · 29/11/2020 20:43

It's absolutely up to him imo.

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Firefliess · 29/11/2020 20:48

I'd reassure him that it's fine to put it up, or keep it in a drawer somewhere - maybe he'll want to wear it to a pride event some day. Maybe not. And that being gay doesn't have to be the whole of his identity.

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Gwynfluff · 29/11/2020 20:51

My kids have them up - but they purchased them and made the decision. I’m fine with it. I work in a certain setting and wear a rainbow lanyard at work and have done for several years. It’s no big deal but he shouldn’t do anything he isn’t comfortable with

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Rosebud2005 · 29/11/2020 22:55

Yeah he came to and told me about it but I got the distinct feeling he was unsure of it. I’m completely fine about the whole thing anyway and he knows that. He came out a year ago but still hasn’t told the rest of the family and I’m not sure when or when if he will. I hope for his piece of mind he comes round to the idea one day as I feel he’s putting himself under a lot of pressure about whether he should or not. I know it will be absolutely fine and they will all be as proud and as happy for him as we are to be himself. I’ll be honest - I’m no expert. We’ve had conversations and I told him to keep me right too as I want to be able to give him my full support and I don’t want to sound daft at times which I probably do. I did say he could maybe find a way of putting it in the room like maybe wrapping round his headboard or as part of something but I also said he doesn’t have to have it out if not makes him uneasy. I’m sure he’ll work it out. We do talk a lot but in general at the moment I’m finding his mood really changing and he keeps telling me nothing is wrong. I don’t want to keep asking x

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DifficultPifcultLemonDifficult · 29/11/2020 23:03

He has maybe said something to his friend that he hasn't said to you, and, in her teenage wisdom, she has given him the flag to force the issue a bit.

Its totally up to him whether he displays it or not and when.

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