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Soon to be exh has rung my solicitor

(8 Posts)
Unlikelyamazonian Wed 04-Nov-09 15:27:48

Anybody out there who can help with a query? My husband abandoned us for Thailand a year and a half ago (ds is now nearly 2.)

He pats no money etc, no contact. He agreed by text to a divorce but didn't respond to the papers. Court gave me permission to ahead and the Absolute is due on Nove 12th.

This morning my sol's secretary rang me and said he has left a message on my sol's ansaphone asking to speak with him. She said they want instruction from me over what to do...

I have no idea what he wants. Does he have an automatic right to speak to my sol as in he is 'representing himself' ???

Can I ask my sol to refuse contact with him? See if he persists or just goes away? Should I get my sol to email him (we have an email address for him) saying that he will only accept any contact from him in writing???


Sparks Wed 04-Nov-09 15:59:25

He has no 'right' to speak to your solicitor, but I'm not sure it's wise to refuse all contact.

If I were you, I would want to know what he wanted to speak to sol about. Better than waiting until next week and getting a shock.

I would ask the sol to email him, asking what he wants and asking him to reply in writing.

OldLadyKnowsNothing Wed 04-Nov-09 16:43:35

Who's paying for him to speak to your solicitor? Don't they generally charge for consults etc? hmm

CarGirl Wed 04-Nov-09 16:46:52


Hmm perhaps ask your solicitor to phone him and say that all contact must be in writing only which is surely how it works if it is solicitor to solicitor?

It would be better if he were writing to you as the solicitor will charge you for replying to him etc.

Biobytes Wed 04-Nov-09 20:31:15

ExH did this, he emailed him demanding a further explanation on what he meant by XYZ and why that was fair.

I told my solicitor that if my exH needed legal advice perhaps he needed to consider the possibility of hiring a solicitor himself rather than bombarding mine with questions at my expense.

I think that if he wants to let you know of something impotarnt, he can send the solicitor and email, but asking the solicitor to ring him is a bit rich, considering they charge an average of £18 for every 6 minutes block of conversation and that doesn't include international telephone fares.

Now, in case that you are itching to know what he wants... can he say anything that make you change your mind about getting the decree absolute? If not, then forget about it.

mumofsatan Thu 05-Nov-09 05:40:04

Your solicitor can't refuse to communicate with him as he is in person. Your solicitor should however suggest he seek independent legal advice and instruct a solicitor but if he doesn't, it is preferable that all communication is in writing

Unlikelyamazonian Thu 05-Nov-09 07:54:12

Thanks very much for all your advice.

I am speaking to my sol this afternoon and will suggest that he speaks to him but says only what mumofsatan suggests. Not that I want anything in writing from him. Or any other sort of communication. Not even by pidgeon. Ever. Gggrrr

Thanks again.

Biobytes Thu 05-Nov-09 11:22:19

If that is the only thing to do, and considering the timescale, perhaps just allowing him to ring again would be more than enough.

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