Contact - ex partner out of prison

[Someoneatemydog]

The father of my child has just come out of prison. His family have already tried to get me to meet them (to give presents) a likely story!
I have a restraining order for myself but not for my son.
My ex served 8 months of a 2 year sentence and is now on tag for ABH against me. This is playing it down somewhat. He stamped on my head and kicked me so hard he put his foot through he wall.
I am obviously concerned about future contact with my son.
Has anyone had similar experience with dv and know the steps forward?
I have blocked his family as they don’t seem too understand my fears for my child. From my understanding, my ex’s mother was abused by her husband so doesn’t understand the severity of the situation.
Is he or his family likely to get contact with my son? I have been advised is unlikely but need to hear from other parents as I know courts favour contact with fathers these days.

[MrsBertBibby]

How old is your son?

[rockingrubble]

He's 3

[Mc180768]

As you are a victim of violence in the home, and your partner was convicted of this, his Probation Officer should have outlined the risks he takes by contacting you. It could mean a recall for him if he breaches the RO. Also, his PO would have a duty to inform Children Services were you to be contacted by him.

In terms of you, were you supported by Victim Support during the court case? If so, Victim Support should be informed that he has been released from prison.

Also, should his post-prison supervision not be robust enough and you feel your child and you are at risk, you should contact your local IDVA.

His family would have to make an application to court to have contact with your child. As would he.

You have blocked his family from contacting you, that sends a strong message. If you feel at risk, call 101 and log a harassment once there have been more than two courses of unwanted action from them in trying to contact you. If two attempts of unwanted contact occur, that is an offence under the Protection of Harrassment Act.

You can call Women's Aid also free of charge for advice.

Stay strong, but please do tap into local support services. They are really worth their weight in gold.

I work with women leaving prison many of which are DV victims themselves, so te post-prison process should be handled by his PO. If he does make contact, please do ring the police immediately so the contact can be logged which should then go through to his PO.

Use what is available to you. It is vital for the safety of your son and you.

[rockingrubble]

I hadn't been contacted by victim support but have had help from IDAS. They helped me get back on my feet and eventually I've got my life back.
Nobody made me aware of his release I found out from FACEBOOK!
Which came as a shock at 10pm at night.
I have moved house, changed my number and have a very different life now.
I called the police and they have advised until he makes a move I am limited in what action I can take.
So basically, until me or my child are in immediate danger, I have no help.
This fills me with joy as you can imagine. I may add my ex takes a lot of cocaine, gambles and has a raging anger problem.

[rockingrubble]

I've been made aware that once he applies for contact then I can get a residence order, at least il know my child is safe. I'm just a little uneasy about any contact as my son doesn't even know who he is now and it will only confuse and upset him!

[MrsBertBibby]

My advice (family solicitor) is that you refuse contact. If he choses to go to court he may or may not succeed, but there will be proper reports, proper safety measures, use of professional contact centres etc to mitigate risks if contact is ordered at all.

If you are scared of him just turning up, snatching from nursery etc, then there are steps you can take but that is likely to result in him seeking contact, whereas at present, it doesn't seem he is.

[rockingrubble]

Thank you for the advice :)