I hope someone can help or point me in the right direction. I shall try to be was brief as I can.
I have 6 children with my ex.We are not married. T youngest child is 8 and the eldest just 17. When we lived together we were in a very large house with land etc etc. my name is not on the mortgage but I did put a lot of money into the house at one point.
He was and is an abusive man, mostly emotional, always financial and sometimes physical
3 odd years ago we decided we needed to split. The idea was I was to move out with the youngest 4 dc so that he could fix the house up to sell and then he would buy us both smaller houses.
I moved out, the oldest dc wanted to stay with him.
Of course 3 years down the line he is still in his house and I am still renting. He has a cleaner /housekeeper and a gardener. He pays no child support and claims he is broke ( self employed).
It has always been his opinion that i am a shit person and mother. He has told the older children a lot of lies about me and has worked very hard to get them onside. The oldest of my children living with me is a dd age 14 who adores him. A few months ago he worked with her so that she could spend 4 nights a week at his house. i didn't want it to happen and has\d no choice. I couldn't make her stay. he had told her it was better for her to be away from the noise of having 3 younger sibs.,. but felt powerless.
Dd is flightly and stubborn, she also self harms. I am her legal guardian and have PR for her.
I need to know what rights I have as far as all this goes. Can he just say she wants to stay with him therefore that is happening? Is it possible for me to get a formal agreement so that he has to stick to the days he has her and not enable her to swap and change whenever she feels like it?
I understand any judge would listen to what she wants ( which is time in both houses). What i can't stand is being pissed around like this. But he frightens me and the way he influences the children fighters me.
He has filled the large house with students and he and the children basically live in one room. He sleeps in the front room and the children have rooms at the top of the house. He is now doing self employed van driving and is often away all day and most of the evenings, leaving dd alone with her brothers ( not really a problem). Of course I don't get a penny, he would now argue he has 3 children and i have 3 therefore we are even.
last night she dd(14) was with me and he was due to collect her. He didn't turn up until 9.50 because he had been playing football.. I just can't stand this behaviour. I want it to stop.
Any advice please?
Thanks for reading.
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my rights re children
2 replies
bigbuttons · 08/09/2015 14:09
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