Family ring lost by jeweller - what's best to do?

[LongTailedTit]

Not sure if this is the right place to ask, but wondered what to do!
Apologies for the long post, I'm trying to explain it properly and I'm long winded...

I was given my Grannie's engagement ring after she died, a gold band with a v large semi-precious stone.

It was difficult for DM and DAunt to decide who to give it to, me, my sis, or my cousin, but my name came out of the hat last year and I was v v happy!
DSis was a bit gutted, but we decided it would be nice to have two copies made, one for DSis, and one for DCousin's 40th birthday (2014).
DSis was leaving the UK for a couple of years, so I lent it to her for her anniversary party, and after she took it to her jeweller in London for him to resize for me, and to quote for making two copies, leaving it there in summer 2012.
He made both mine and her engagement rings and she's known him over 10 years, he's a v high quality jeweller who does work and repairs for high end jewellery houses (DSis met him thru work when temping).

I called him a couple of months later re collecting it (hadn't been able to get hold of him to make the appt!), and after a few voicemails, he called to tell me he couldn't find it.
He kept searching, he found my silver ring that it had been delivered with for size comparison, but couldn't find the other one anywhere. He thought it would turn up with his annual workshop clear out, but no.
It is definitely lost.
He has apologised, but nothing makes it better, and I'm so cross that he didn't take care if it. The guy has £80k diamond rings scattered around his extremely messy and badly organised desk FFS, I doubt he's ever lost one of those! But my Gran's fairly worthless but to us priceless ring has either been lost down a floorboard or nicked by a visitor. :(

I was v upset, but have realised that doesn't really help so feel quite philosophical about it now.

DSis took over the email conversation with him earlier this year when he was still searching, he has agreed to make a replacement ring for no charge, but has not been forthcoming about when and exactly what (we weren't 100% sure what the stone was). I haven't been in touch with him for six months, tbh I'm still hoping it'll turn up.
DSis wants him to make the two copies at the same time, which makes sense as I have no idea where else to go for them, but his attitude has sucked tbh, and I really want him to offer a substantial discount at least!!

The ring isn't listed on our house insurance as they only wanted jewellery worth over £1k itemised. I don't even know how much Grannie's ring was worth, I'd hazard a guess at somewhere between £250-500 at most.

Any advice gladly welcomed, thanks

[ZillionChocolate]

Terrible service from him. I wonder whether your not being very pushy has given him the impression that you're not that bothered, obviously you are. There seems to be no point in letting this drift any longer.

Is there any jewellers association he's signed up to? I wonder whether that may be a way of getting advice on what happens in these situations.

[LongTailedTit]

Thanks for replying! I hadn't thought of that, good idea, he must be in some trade organisation or something.
I just keep hoping it'll turn up, guess I feel like if I get a replacement made it'll be a bit final.

[SavoyCabbage]

I would keep at him about the replacements and copies as it seems that part of the problem is that a long period of time has elapsed since it all began.

To me, it sounds like he is not trying to be unhelpful, he's just not overly organised.

I would decide what you want from him and a timeframe, and put it in writing.

I would make it clear to him that if he ever finds the ring, you want it back as it means a lit to you.

I would try to enjoy the fact that the three of you all will have identical rings that are a copy of your Grannies. It could be seen as more special rather than less special.

[LongTailedTit]

You're right on all counts Savoy - I don't think he's being deliberately difficult, just doesn't understand the sentimental value of what's a cheap ring to him, and yes he's massively badly organised.

I just need to decide exactly what I want I guess, and get on with it ASAP! Everything in writing, and not just by email, he's rubbish at replying.

Do you think it's sensible to get him to make all three copies? I feel it is, whereas DH thinks it'd be a stupid idea after all the upset caused.
Do you think it's fair to ask for a 'deal' on the two extra copies in the circs?
I won't be paying for either (DSis will pay me back for hers, and Cousin's DH for hers), but it's more the principle of the thing.

Only my sis and I know the ring is lost, we haven't told anyone else as they'd be upset. DAunt and cousin also in US so won't find out unless we tell them.
My mum's flying over for a visit next spring so if we get the copies done by March she can be courier and give it to cousin's DH (ring is to be a surprise from him).
If a reputable jeweller can lose a ring in his tiny workshop I don't trust the post!

[SavoyCabbage]

I think its fine to ask about a discount for the other two copies. For a start it's got to be easier to make three rings the same than all different.

I would ask him to make the copies as your sister knows he is good at what he does. Also, I would want the three rings to have a connection as I think that would be a lovely thing.

[LongTailedTit]

Thanks, I just don't know what's fair, it's not exactly something I deal with every day! Stinky nappies and tantrumming children yes, haggling over gemstones and goldsmithery, not so much.....

I need to try to get the ring drawn up exactly, but can't remember the exact cut and setting so I've been trawling our old photo files on the computer this afternoon searching for pics of Grannie wearing the ring, have only found three where its in shot, two of which are v blurry.
Hoping my sis has a few high-res ones from her anniversary party, fingers crossed there are a couple of decent shots.

[LongTailedTit]

Follow-up!

Sis sent me a great detailed pic of the ring, have printed out copies for the jeweller.

Called him, he was v nice, much more pleasant than the last time we spike. He still reckons it'll turn up someday but agrees it's best to get the replacement and copies made ASAP regardless.

He has actually made up a citrine ring already based on what he discussed with my sis, and the price of the copies has dropped by 20% due to materials costs going down - says he'll do them for just £100 each. That's a v good price I think, as I popped into a local jewellers to ask a quote and they said £500-600!

I'm going in to see him in the new year (as soon as I can get someone to watch DS for me!), to see the new ring and arrange the copies.
If I don't think the setting/stone colour of the new ring is spot on, I'll refuse it and give him the pics I found so he can make a new one up.

All needs to be done and dusted by the end of March latest as I'm due DC2 on 3rd May and DS came a month early! I'll have my hospital bag packed by then, so can't see me trudging up seven steep flights of stairs to a jewellers attic workshop!

Thank you for the replies Savoy & Zillion, it helped motivate me to get this sorted.