ooops! the unexpected extra. no. 4!

[Hattie05]

Well.......

well......

well......

Thats pretty much all dp and i have said to each other this evening since we discovered i'm expecting no. 4! dd 3 is only 7months, dd2 is 3yrs and dd1 is 7yrs.

And only yesterday did we agree we definitely didn't want anymore children .

don't get me wrong - finding out i'm pregant, i consider it a blessing and delighted to have another baby, i appreciate many are not so fortunate.

But ...omg we can barely afford to live at the moment! let along with four upgrading car etc. I'd just thrown out all newborn clothes and maternity clothes!
And how exactly do you go shopping with two babies that don't walk? ( i realise many people manage but scares the hell out of me!)

The thing i'm going to hate the most, is people assuming i'm hoping for a boy as that was the case with my third pregnancy and i was utterly offended when i total stranger said i must have been gutted when i found out it was another girl! Myself and dp are not that contrived we love our children regardless of their gender and will be totally delighted to find that no. 4 is a girl too.

Am i going to find this all really hard? Please do tell all...............

[welshandproud]

i was in a similar place just over a year ago. I now have DD1 11 DD2 3 DS1 23months and DS2 9 months.I cant live without my double buggy and we now have a honda frv which has 6 seats!
I'm not going to say its easy but its lots of fun and my house is a tip but its never quiet or dull.
Congratulations i'm slightly envious, DP had snip 3 months ago so we've definately finished now!

[Hattie05]

Ah thanks you two! you've made me feel better!

Pixie - twins!! my partner keeps reminding me that twins run in the family, i don't even want to think about it ....

[chaostrulyreigns]

I had DS when DD1 was 7, DD2 was 5 and DD3 was 3.5.

It's all great now - but made myself stop calling him a surprise when he got to 1! (just gone 4 btw).

Life is good.

Need a 7 seater though.

[chaostrulyreigns]

Oh and yes we've gone down the snip route too.

[Maybee]

Congratulations Hattie. I think thats lovely news although I can relate to how you might be feeling. We have 3 ds 7, 2.6 and 10 months. On my 40th birthday a month ago we were a bit careless and I was convinced I was pg with no 4! It was terrifying as we are skint with 3 and our relationship has been well tested as it is. Anyway turns out I'm not so although it was a relief especially for dh I was a tad disappointed and am now v broody again. I reckon we would have been delighted in the longterm. Dh is now on about the snip but I hate the very word. The gap between ds2 and 3 is about 19months but it works ok. I've had a double buggies that was pushed through the snow all winter (surefire way of burning the cals) Now we have a buggy and ride on board which they love. In the early days it was v trying and can be stressful when they are all sick or someone falls or something but overall its great fun and they all play/roll about together which is heartening. The housework is a nightmare but not sure how much worse it can be with 4 when you're used to 3.
Enjoy things have a way of working out! People are already asking me if we're going to try for a girl now and its irritating as hell!

[Hattie05]

chaos - i know i feel terrible that one day the 'mistake' we're currently discussing will actually be a little person - i would hate them to ever find out we referred to them as a mistake!

Maybe thanks for the congratulations and confidence boost with age difference. I won't be expecting many congrats as i know myself when i've met people expecting the fourth i'm more likely to go 'omg are you mad?' and then check myself and slip in a little congrats at the end!

I do have a double buggy at the moment as my 3 yr old can't always make the afternoon school pick up she's so tired. But i despise the thing. Our walk is up hill and i have arthritis which i think really flares up when i've used the double buggy too often! I spose two younger ones in it will make it feel a lot lighter!

oh hum de hum i can't quite believe it - still in shock wonder when that'll end?

[TRL]

I think life will be chaotic for a while, but the fun and happiness you'll have with your gang will make it so worth while.

I have a 16 month gap between 2 of mine (there are 4 altogether) and they are the best friends of the lot, always together, playing and chuckling. Honestly, it's fab. Congratulations to you and yr DH.

[colie]

Congratulations.

I have 3 dd's who are 8 (just turned), 4 and a half, 2 and a half and now a ds who is 17 days old. Gap not as small as yours but like you had 3 dd's then had our lovely surprise (he was indeed, as dh had vasectomy as soon as dd3 was born). Vasectomy was not quite the success dh wanted it to be!!

I stopped thinking that people thought we were trying for a boy. They probably all were but all that is important is what you and your family think. When I was pregnant with dd3 two people actually said to my dh "maybe he would be blessed with a son this time".

I know I am so lucky to have 4 children and although I am no expert on having 4 children, as only 17 days into it, so far so good .

The good thing is that your dd3 will still have daytime naps when dc4 is born so if you synchronise daytime naps you might get a break or time to spend individually with one of your other children. Or some naptime yourself . Can you tell I am a bit sleep deprived at the moment!!

Congratulation.

[sweetkitty]

You will be fine and cope fine because you have to.

I have 6yoDD1, 4yoDD2, 2yoDD3 and 8woDS, expect everyman and his dog to do the trying for a boy thing, it will annoy hell out of you even if you get the messiah child aka the boy.

Life is utterly hectic, we have the huge 7 seater bus car now which I hate driving but I wouldn't change it for the world, another little baby lucky you

[Hattie05]

ah thanks all for the supportive comments!

The news is sinking in and i am looking forward to a big crew of children. But still very scared!

dd3 has been a tricky baby - and a big shock to my system as the first two were angels.

dd3 will not sleep other than being rocked which of course results in her not getting enough sleep cos she wakes screaming about where we have gone when she's been put in her cot.
She also has major seperation anxiety and screams when i leave the room.

Any tips please offer!

In fact i may go do another thread for this one!

[mollycuddles]

Congrats. I've just had dc3 6 weeks ago and may well take the plunge with dc4 so I lurk here now. I often got asked if I was mad when announced pg with my third. People are so full of cr&p. At least it happened early enough so you'd only thrown out maternity and newborn stuff. We have a 9 year gap between dc2 and 3 and I've had to start again completely from scratch. I'm v impressed you even managed to conceive dc4 though as we also now have a permanently attached babe. I'm not planning ttc just yet but wouldn't mind some practice. What is your secret?

[Wallace]

Congratulations

I am pregnant with number four and you are so right about the comments. It is either "Oh my god are you mad?!" Followed by congratulations. Or the really thoughtful people say congratulations first, followed by "You must be mad!"

[SKYTVADDICT]

Congratulations. I too have 4. DD1 14, DD2 10, DS1 3 and DS2 nearly 2 (15 months apart). DS2 was a surprise.

Definite double buggy, they share a room, I have become a childminder this year as can't afford to put them both in childcare while I go to work!

House is always chaos but no-one seems to mind too much - I do get a bit emabarrassed when the DDs bring friends round and take them upstairs which is generally a tip.

We got a Grand Scenic but now wish we had gone for an Espace as the Scenic isn't huge.

[MUM2BLESS]

I have four children, three boys and a girl.

You will be fine. Four is not a lot different to three. I think a lot of people who love to have more children if they could for whatever reason.

You will need of course to change your routine a little. It will be a great opportuntiy for the older two to be your little helpers.

Enjoy your kids and all the best with number dour.

[gorionine]

Congratulations!

Have got 4 as well (11-9-6-3 1/2).School run ( well, the all bit before leaving the house actually) is a bit hectic but cannot imagine my life without one of them!

Biggest change has been to get a 7 seater really.

[Fennel]

Congratulations. We had the snip after 3 girls but I do occasionally get a teeny bit jealous of those with 4 girls. like the March family....

[catbus]

I am pg with #4 aswell; 31 weeks and still kind of in shock!!
Don't think I am prepared at all and it's always so hectic at home..

I have 11 yr old DD1, DD2 aged 7 and DS who will be 2.9 at the expected due date. Have always had bigger gaps, so not sure what to expect this time..

We Home Ed aswell, so one more in the chaotic mix should be interesting!

I too have given EVERYTHING away and am panicking now as we are always skint and 9 weeks to get stuff together. Also anxious about this birth more than any of them.
God only knows if we can afford to upgrade the car to a bigger one?!

I am empathising away here, and wish you the best of luck; although still in shock am now actually getting excited! Woo hoo!!!