Ivf whilst working full time

(16 Posts)
duckling3 Sun 27-Oct-19 09:26:37

Hi all. I am starting down the route of ivf. I have first appointment with the consultant in November.

I work full time and currently trying to decide how much I need / want to tell my boss. I know work will be impacted by all the hospital visits , but not really sure how much. I'm also contemplating asking for a period of unplanned leave during the treatment so I can manage my stress levels and time without worrying about work. I prob won't tell them anything until after the first appointment, so have a bit of time to make any decision.

Just thought i'd see if there are any others here who are in/have been though ivf whilst working, and how see others have chosen to manage things.

OP’s posts: |
BeamerTown Sun 27-Oct-19 09:33:38

Hello! First of all, I’ve been there and I know how stressful the “planning things” bit is, so I feel for you. Hope you’re ok.

I just went the whole hog and told my boss. I spoke to HR first (I was senior so had an informal chat with our HR director) and told her I was planning on treating this like any other medical scenario, and would need some time off relatively regularly for scans etc. I told her how I was going to manage it - I’d be contactable, I’d let her know about appointments, I’d still be able to manage the team, I’d perhaps need a week off at short notice around the point we found out results in case it wasn’t positive.

My boss responded really well. I think there’s increased awareness around IVF and the impact it can have, and she was supportive. I think from other comments made she did tell her boss - the CEO - which I didn’t appreciate, but would take if that’s the price of having the flexibility.

I think - when all is said and done - people want to know how you are going to do it with the least disruption to them and your role. So going in with a plan is the best way to do that.

I actually found it far less stressful to be in work during the process itself - less time to be sitting at home thinking about it - but you know yourself best and my home, hospital and work weren’t that far from each other.

BeamerTown Sun 27-Oct-19 09:34:21

Oops, sent without finishing - wishing you all the best with it all. It’s harder for some than others - and I hope it’s plain sailing for you.

Wesstywoo Sun 27-Oct-19 09:45:48

Hi @duckling3 I am lucky that I can take appointments without explanation, I just make sure they are as early in the day as possible. As for egg collection, recovery and transfer I took this as annual leave. So far I've had a fresh cycle and FET and my work are none the wiser

Persipan Sun 27-Oct-19 09:52:05

I have done five cycles of IVF while working full time (a mixture of own egg and donor egg, ultimately there were four cycles which got to transfer). I didn't tell my work; I just told them that I'd have a series of medical appointments coming up at short notice but not to worry, I wasn't deathly ill or anything. Because my clinic is in another city, I had to travel for monitoring so I generally took half days off as annual leave (I never use all my leave anyway so it didn't cause me any problems).

itwasalovelydreamwhileitlasted Sun 27-Oct-19 09:52:13

I worked full time during both my cycles - my clinic starts scans at 730am so that you can get them done before work and they also have other clinics dotted around the country so when I was working in London I popped there for scans

I took annual leave for egg collection and transfer

I did tell boss what was going on but that's because I knew he was really supportive - also having to do injections at work on the floor of the disabled loo wasn't great so I did work from home a couple of those days at his suggestion x

Youngatheart00 Sun 27-Oct-19 10:43:41

My work actually has a policy for IVF and allows up to 12 days leave (not counted as annual leave or conventional ‘sickness’)

I had no idea until I asked and was directed to it.

So far, I’ve used 2 days of that and I’ll only use what I need but it helps to know it’s there.

It all depends on how much you are comfortable sharing with your employer.

Chirpychirpy3 Sun 27-Oct-19 11:29:50

I told work as it would have been difficult to get the time off otherwise. They were very supportive. I had annual leave for egg collection. Best of luck

GrumpyHoonMain Sun 27-Oct-19 11:35:23

I managed it two ways. First cycle I told my boss, he helped, but expected the first cycle to work; when it didn’t he effectively used ivf to block my promotion. Second cycle I didn’t tell boss and just arranged to take a few days off at egg collection by using my sick family members as an excuse, and worked from home for a few days around embryo transfer.

duckling3 Sun 27-Oct-19 16:38:34

Thanks for all the replies ☺️ it's very helpful hearing what others chose to do. Still haven't decided what I will do, but I have a few weeks to think it through still, and it might be easier once I know things like the starting time for scans and things like that.

OP’s posts: |
Kirmcd Sun 27-Oct-19 18:18:11

I told my boss, I’m a teacher so unfortunately couldn’t just take annual leave. My scan appointments were on a first come, first served basis from 8am so just tried to be one of the first there,. Luckily egg retrievel was on a Friday so only had to take one sick day and fortunately that was beginning of a week off. Down to have second round in February as wanted a few months off but will probably need to tell my boss again. Luckily she was fine about it.

JeNeBaguetteRien Sun 27-Oct-19 22:32:44

I didn't tell my work for first 2 rounds, the first of which was actually cancelled before egg collection.
When I did get to egg collection I took that day off as sick leave and said I was having a gynae procedure under anaesthetic.
My clinic were very regimented though and decided egg collection date in advance and worked backwards and only a set number of scans (I think this contributed to first cycle cancellation as another clinic might have adjusted dosage or stimmed me for longer).
Anyway I'm soon to try again and will probably reluctantly tell my manager this time as there are meetings coming up which would be difficult to miss without good reason. I'd really prefer not to, but if I must then I will also ask for some paid leave for egg collection and transfer day as per the IVF policy in place.

Good work whatever you decide.

LillyLeaf Wed 30-Oct-19 08:42:12

There's an interesting article on the BBC news app about fertility treatment and work.

updownleftrightstart Wed 30-Oct-19 15:00:30

I didn't take any leave at all but my work offers a degree of flexitime without question. So I picked the closest clinic to my work and I'd schedule appointments first thing, over lunch, or after work. Egg collection luckily fell on a weekend and I was back at my desk 20 mins after embryo transfer.

Nofunkingworriesmate Wed 30-Oct-19 15:06:27

I took a week off first time (successful)
Subsequent tries did not take time off ( one attempt failed another successful). Misscarried over Xmas holidays would have needed to take time off for that as quite painful for couple of days
All depends how stressful your job is only you can make that decision best of luck

BlueLadybird Sat 02-Nov-19 13:16:26

I told my boss and don’t regret it. He was nice about it and it meant I didn’t need to worry at all about when appointments were or what time I needed off I just told him when I wouldn’t be there. He didn’t tell anyone else.

I had four scans which I worked around and then two days off for egg collection (I think I would have been ok with one but had already cancelled my meetings for the next day and OH was keen I rested) and then another for embryo transfer (could have easily gone to work after, but as I had bailed on an important meeting that day it would have looked suspicious if I had turned up).

My work offers 5 days paid leave each year for IVF but my boss didn’t record them - I suspect as he couldn’t be bothered with the paperwork which suits me fine.

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