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Worst thing about IVF?

(17 Posts)
Avocadosmoothie Sat 18-Feb-17 17:01:19

Hi, for anyone who has had IVF, what did you find was the worse bit of the process e.g. The injections, retrieval, the anxiety etc? Thanks

spinduffy Sat 18-Feb-17 17:05:53

The anxiety and the amount of hurdles. At my scans my number of follicles was low and number if eggs retrieved was lower than predicted. The physical side is fine!

sebashocked Sat 18-Feb-17 17:10:06

The anxiety. It's such a rollercoaster of emotions, trying to be positive but not wanting to get your hopes up. Feelings of failure if things don't work out. Think initially it's all very exciting but the 2ww is a killer - constant knicker checking and symptom spotting whilst trying to remember that all the drugs give you major pregnancy symptoms so not knowing if the sore boobs and ovary twinges are pregnancy or just side effects. Good luck on your journey.

Cutesbabasmummy Sat 18-Feb-17 17:23:32

The two week wait....

D0nnaLyman Sat 18-Feb-17 17:24:39

Not knowing if it will work, or if it will all be for nothing. Trying to arrange work around all the short notice appointments. I had OHSS which is rubbish, but the rest of the physical stuff isn't dreadful.

Good luck!!

Nan0second Sat 18-Feb-17 17:25:59

The anxiety
Other people's expectations (i.e. That you just pop to a clinic and boom you're pregnant and then have a healthy baby 9 months later, when the reality is that the odds are 40% at best)

2014newme Sat 18-Feb-17 17:27:41

Being childless and the fear that would never change.

Hobbes39 Sat 18-Feb-17 17:33:46

Definitely the anxiety. It's not that physically it's easy as pie or anything, but I could cope with the physical side much better than the sheer disappointment at each stage from the start of stimulation. I had less follicles respond than expected, less eggs retrieved than expected, less fertilise than expected and then them being lower quality that I'd hoped...
So it's was just a series of disappointments for me... obviously it's not like that for everyone, or for every cycle, but it is a possibility. I found the balance between being positive without getting hopes up too much impossible. We are about to do it all again and the eternal optimist in me feels it has to go better this time... I hope it does for you!

Blondeshavemorefun Sat 18-Feb-17 22:22:44

Ec in 2 cycles was horrendous and painful

Daily injections don't bother me

The actual process of ivf is fine. So the scans injections ok tho waiting to find out if any survived after ec is hard

Think the worst bit is the failure sad

Hopefully your cycle will work

We had 4 failed all private and each failure ripped our hearts apart plus the fact still had to pay the loan off

Always wondering if ivf will ever work. Would I ever be a mummy

Avocadosmoothie Sat 18-Feb-17 22:40:28

Blondes - so sorry to hear that! What stage did you get to on each cycle? Do you know why ec was worse on particular cycles? Also, do you mind me asking how old you are?

Blondeshavemorefun Sat 18-Feb-17 23:23:32

Cycle 1&2 same clinic in uk

Others had bfp results there. I didn't. For me after having cycle 3 abroad at diff clinic their whole approach was diff - for example they did a mock transfer to check they could enter my cervix easily - they couldn't and needed dilation

Uk didn't do mock and I think ec was so painful as they ripped through my cervix and poked about up there to get the follicles as they didn't know my cervix had closed

Did 3 fresh cycles.

But before 3rd which was our first abroad they did nick found our cervix had shut and dilated it. Hence why I think ec was fine abroad. Tad uncomfy like smears but nothing compared to pain of 1&2

Df could hear me screaming next door while he waited sad

C1 Had 1 left for 3D transfer
C2 had 3 left for 3D transfer and they said wouldn't last blast or freeze so put all 3 back
C3 had think 9 left at day 5 - they left 2 to go to day 6 and froze - froze the other 6 and put one up me

That failed

C4 fet from c3 failed
C5 fet from c3 - bfp

The first I've ever had since ttc for 10yrs. Currently 34w

I'm 43 and own eggs as always told good for my age

Think c3 for much better results as they gave me higher drugs to produce more eggs and their whole approach and technology including freezing way above uk clinic

They believe a fet has better chance then fresh as body has a month + to recover and if survived the freezing process the also gives a strong chance

Abroad clinic also did icsi as part of package where as uk didn't even mention it and tbh we were a bit naive and should have researched more

Tho if all the frozen had failed df and I said we would have tried de for one last try

Avocadosmoothie Sun 19-Feb-17 06:50:31

What a journey!!! I'm so relieved you got pregnant in the end, congratulations!! What's the UK clinic private or NHS? Where abouts are you based? I'm looking at clinics in Manchester.

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 19-Feb-17 07:14:48

Thank you. By 4th failure we just didn't think would work and almost blase about 5th going in

All private as df has kids in 20's and kent

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 19-Feb-17 07:18:06

Tho the uk clinic does do NHS as well and my friend got preg first time there tho only had one left to implant and one to freeze and she is 8yrs younger then me

It is a fine line. Over stimulate and risk ohss and possibly lose eggs and you be ill

Under stim and get less eggs

Often why they say give 3 cycles a chance as learn how body responds to drugs each time

Wishing you all the luck 💐

spinduffy Sun 19-Feb-17 07:43:59

Blondes how did you decide on a clinic abroad? Which clinic?

Frazzled2207 Sun 19-Feb-17 07:47:42

Wow Blondes what a journey, best of luck to you x

Blondeshavemorefun Sun 19-Feb-17 08:11:39

Df and I had been looking abroad and I'm a maternity nurse and 2 of my clients went to this clinic plus another one to USA for de

The families I work for have money and researched many abroad must have to afford me lol and df and I thought if good enough for them then good enough for us iyswim

I did email the 4 mentioned on here a lot abroad

Reprofit Prague
Serum Athens
Ivf Barcelona
Ivi Madrid

We imm felt at ease at Madrid after their email and info and phone call - and flew over to chat to them as only 2hr flight - where you can do Skype if prefer

As short flights we flew to Madrid and back easily in a day also important if can't always take lots of time off work

Tho Obv stayed there a night for ec

But the transfers can be done easily in one day

I wish you all luck. If older like me due to Mother Nature not playing ball then get all your tests done - check amh and fsh and if not the best results then personally I would consider de - tho my results good so used own eggs

Df and I said if all our frozen failed we would do de for one last attempt

And over time I have met several mums who use de and all couldn't love their child more. Know some may feel they couldn't bond with their baby as 'not 100% their dna' but this doesn't seem to be the case

They grew their baby and couldn't love them more

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