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Sometimes I hate being a woman

(26 Posts)
handlemecarefully Mon 01-Oct-07 17:03:49

I feel vulnerable every time I walk my dogs alone in our local woods, and I'm always looking over my shoulder when I go running down quite New Forest lanes sad...(thinking is that car driver going to try and bundle me into their car...there is nobody else around to witness it)

Freckle Mon 01-Oct-07 17:09:06

Not nice, is it? They don't say what sort of dog she had, but I suspect it wasn't a big one if it didn't protect her.

I love to take our dogs walking in woods, but rarely do it alone.

handlemecarefully Mon 01-Oct-07 17:13:16

I hate having my wings clipped in this way. I do sometimes walk the dogs in the woods alone, but I am ever vigilant and never relaxed sad

Poor woman - was just hoping to enjoy a walk with her dog and look what happens

policywonk Mon 01-Oct-07 17:17:37

I know exactly what you mean, and it really irritates me too. I almost never go for walks in isolated places without another adult. It makes me mad that male violence ('cos let's face it, that's almost certainly what did for this poor woman), aside from its immediate effects on its victims, also has the effect of making large swathes of the female population feel vulnerable in situations like this.

SueBaroo Mon 01-Oct-07 17:20:16

It's glum-making, isn't it? It's bullies winning, and I hate it, but there's nothing at all to be done about it.

*in a crappy defeatist mood today*

policywonk Mon 01-Oct-07 17:22:41

I was thinking of suggesting 'Reclaim the Night' (or 'Reclaim the Woods')-type events, but they are mostly symbolic I suppose.

SueBaroo Mon 01-Oct-07 17:25:56

Yes, they are really. I love the symbolism, but if you're still too scared to go out at night, that's all it is, really.

having said that, there's something to be said for being wise, of course. But it's the tension between being wise in any given situation, and saying 'this situation isn't right, and something must be done'.

LadyMacbeth Mon 01-Oct-07 17:26:20

I really don't like to walk my mum's dogs in secluded areas on my own, (if I was attacked the labrador would just lick him and Sheltie would roll over on her back!) my mum is completely gung-ho though, tramps about in woodland etc... I find her innocence quite worrying!

Really sorry for the victim and her family. sad

LadyMacbeth Mon 01-Oct-07 17:28:20

(Just re-read my last post - it makes no sense and sounds completely inane. Excuse me.)

Gizmo Mon 01-Oct-07 17:31:46

Oh I'm massively gung ho about it...I tend to work on the assumption that if I were a faceless attacker I'd want to hang out in an area where there was a chance of actually meeting someone to attack. So the more remote, the better in my book.

Of course, this may or may not represent the true state of affairs, but it does mean I don't have to descend into fear and trembling every time I go for a run.

policywonk Mon 01-Oct-07 17:32:52

Of course, the truth is that events like these are incredibly rare, and most of us would have a lifetime's worth of woodland walks with nothing to show for it except a couple of flashers and catching an eyeful of some dogging. Statistically speaking, LadyMacbeth's mother is entirely sensible. In a way, this just makes me more irritated - women's freedom is being infringed by self-imposed curfews based on exaggerated fears.

I still refuse to walk down by our local river though.

Gizmo Mon 01-Oct-07 17:34:16

So true, PolicyWonk.

In truth, you should be much more nervous if you're a young man between 17-30 going out for a night on the lash.

But funnily enough, I don't see them reconsidering their lifestyle hmm

handlemecarefully Mon 01-Oct-07 17:42:31

True but if you are an older man walking alone in the woods you need fear nothing

ratclare Mon 01-Oct-07 20:34:50

lets just remeber that it is still entirely possible that this poor woman knew her attacker ,as is so often the case with violence against women

Freckle Mon 01-Oct-07 22:19:05

I meet up with a friend so that we can walk our dogs in woods local to her. I am amazed when we meet solitary women walking their little lapdogs.

My male dog would protect me to the last (and he's quite big so could inflict some considerable damage) - female puppy not quite so useful. But I still don't feel comfortable walking alone with him in isolated areas.

handlemecarefully Mon 01-Oct-07 22:45:22

How do you know your male dog would protect you?

I ask because I am just not sure about my female (massive) Bernese Mountain Dog. She loves me sure - but she just seems so bovine and 'fick' in the nicest possible way. Would it be wise to presume that she wouldn't?

Dawnybabe Mon 01-Oct-07 22:53:48

Your dog will probably protect you if it's been trained to, like police dogs.

I don't think your run of the mill pet dog would actually do that. My spaniel would probably think a huge game was going on and run round in fast circles barking like an eejit.

handlemecarefully Mon 01-Oct-07 22:55:42

I thought as much!

Eliza2 Tue 02-Oct-07 09:17:29

I still walk my dogs wherever I want. If someone approaches whom I don't like the look of, I make it clear I'm holding a mobile and could photograph them and send off the photo before they get close. Fortunately most of our walks are in areas where you have clear views.

These attacks are fortunately very rare statistically. g

chopchopbusybusy Tue 02-Oct-07 09:36:39

I know these attacks are very rare, but they do fuel my fears. I used to do a lot of cycling in wooded and country areas locally. I hate cycling on roads and used to really enjoy my ten mile round trips off road. BUT even though I live in what is considered a very safe area I still met a few dodgy characters, the most recent was on a bike too, so I didn't feel I could have got away quickly enough. Sadly, my bike is now gathering dust and my arse is gathering lard blush

policywonk Tue 02-Oct-07 09:40:42

That's such a shame, chopchop. Can't you recruit someone to ride with you, or join a cycling club?

SueBarooeeooeeooooo Tue 02-Oct-07 09:44:14

I keep seeing this thread title and hearing Tammy Wynette

RubberDuck Tue 02-Oct-07 09:46:06

I'm not a dog walker, but am a keen photographer.

Now ds2 is in regular nursery and ds1 is in school all day I'd LOVE to go to our local woods with camera - especially at this time of year when the colours are all changing.

I hate the fact that I don't feel safe there, so I end up not going. Wouldn't occur to dh not to go if he had the time and inclination.

Charlee Tue 02-Oct-07 09:46:32

God i hate these news bulitens.

I was nearly abducted when i was 14 while walking through our local nieghbourhood. It was terrifying the police launched a large hunt for the man but never caught him.
He murdered a teenage girl later the same night. sad

I don't walk the streets alone, ever.

handlemecarefully Tue 02-Oct-07 13:09:28

Bloody hell Charlee!

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