I’m really scared of going back to work - how do I calm down?

[Onedropbeat]

This is my second maternity leave

First time I looked forward to returning to work

This time I’m dreading it and I’m panicking and hardly sleeping with the thought of going back after Christmas

It’s not even just one thing, it’s loads of things ...

Baby is breastfed and won’t take a bottle, I hate leaving her
Baby is my last baby and I want to spend as much time as possible with her and wish I could afford to stay off until she goes to school (I can’t afford that)
Work doesn’t seem to believe in Covid and puts pressure on everyone to be in the office.
My job is stressful and busy and because of Covid it will be even worse
They want me to work more than the part time hours I left on (I know they can’t force this)
I disagree with the company ethics
There are members of senior management who are bullies (not to me but to other members of staff)
Management was relaxed but is now untrusting and using micromanaging techniques


I just don’t know what to do

When I left for maternity leave I planned on finding a new job to change to rather than going back as it had got so bad before but now there don’t seem to be any jobs in this market (a seemingly failing market)

[WinoLino]

Sounds awful, did you go back?

[DailyCandy]

Nooo.... you're not being irrational. You're having a moment of complete clarity! Trust yourself. This is not a good place for you. Find something else, it's really damaging to stay in that kind of situation.