This is going to be long, I'm sure, so please bear with me...
So here's the story. Up until about 2 months ago, I was working in a team which consisted of me, a colleague and our manager. We worked well as a team, I covered one area, my colleague covered another, and our manager pulled it all together, and made sure everything was working as it should. We started off fulfilling a quality assurance / technical advice role, but over time we added training to that - which fitted in quite well, and I found I enjoyed training people, as well as supporting them one-to-one.
So everything was hunky-dory, until the company decided that quality and training were a waste of money, and started squeezing my manager out - not letting her in on meetings, giving her edited minutes etc. She couldn't take it after a while, and left before she was pushed (there have been quite a few redundancies recently).
That left me and my colleague. We were told that our manager was not going to be replaced, we were absorbed into another (non-training related) team, and told to get on with what projects we already had started pending us being absorbed into the production side of things. However, training needs kept cropping up (related to the area that I had no experience in), so we were kept busy dealing with them, and I was slowly learning the ropes.
Then, 2 weeks after my manager left, my colleague went on secondment - applied on the Friday 3pm, started on the following Monday. Leaving me in charge of an area that I only vaguely know about or understand.
There is no-one in overall charge of training - it's just me. In the last week, I have been asked to arrange 3 training course for 100 people at 3 sites, and it has to happen NOW. The people asking me to do this have no interest in the fact that it is almost impossible to do this. Any time I try and explain, I am made to feel incompetent and as if I am making excuses. I can't do any job thoroughly, I have lots of ideas on how things should be done - record keeping etc, but no time to do it and no back up - they say "ask if you need support", but don't understand that it would take longer to explain to someone who has no knowledge of the area what to do than to do it myself.
I am really concerned that to save money, the company will decide that I'm enough to cover training co-ordination and planning. Bearing in mind this is a £multi-million company with nearly 500 employees, and I work 30 hours a week, have no previous experience in training co-ordination and planning, and have been given no power to make suggestions / changes - I am supposed to respond to the demands of people who have different priorities, this is surely a recipe for disaster, with me as the sitting duck?
On top of everything, of my 6 hours a day, I am currently delivering training for 2 of those hours every day - a commitment I made before I was on my own and one which I don't want to back out of - then I'd be as bad as "them". But this obviously adds to the pressure.
I have arranged 2 training courses for tomorrow at another site, but as the trainer only confirmed on Friday 4pm that she was going there tomorrow, there are not going to be enough people to fill both courses. so I am going to look like a disorganised fool. I am seriously considering taking a sicky tomorrow, to avoid the cutting and sarcastic emails that I will receive from my manager's manager when it all goes tits up.
I have come home from work in tears again today, as I have a number of times over the past weeks, I feel so powerless. If I tell my manager that I can't do this any more, I am worried that he'll just say "well it's that or nothing". He's a 24 year old, who to be fair is very pleasant, but is under a lot of pressure himself and does not really have the time to concern himself with my problems. I can't afford to change jobs - dh recently had to take a £5K pay cut, and it would be hard for me to find another job round here that pays as much as my current one without going full time (and maybe not even then), which I don't want to do.
I will be having a one-to-one with my manager in the next week, and I will try to explain all of this to him, but I really don't want to break down in tears in front of him - he wouldn't have a clue what to do - and anyway, he'll just think that I'm making excuses for my incompetence.
If you have managed to read this far, thanks for your time. Does anyone have ay experience of this kind of thing, and any advice to offer?
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Please help - too much pressure at work; can't take much more
28 replies
emsiewill · 26/06/2004 21:32
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