Off to Docs later - should the children see this

[tinateaspoon]

OMG I am right billy no mates and cannot find anyone to have the children while I go to the docs this pm. They are 4.5 and nearly 3 and very inquisitive! Now I am worrying about bowel problems and after prolonged diarrhoea and now passing blood I feel I need investigating, particulary as there is a possibility of carrying HNPCC gene. I am trying not to panic, have not googled, but I am scared when I look at the family tree. Anyway I really need to talk to the doctor and I imagine he will want to examine me, so how do I cope with the "why did the doctor put his finger up your bum?" questions . DH is at work and I have not told him as I do not want to worry him, besides he is not the most sympathetic and hasn't even noticed anything might be wrong, just comments like are you in the toilet again and that stinks.

Ok nearly crying now, what am I like, am feeling a bit lonely but worried about the children being at the dr with me, but there is nothing else I can do.

I know no one on here can offer to babysit but any tips on what to do would be great.

Thanks

[FlightHattendant]

Oh dear poor thing

Fwiw, it is usually v v quick when they do this, and they can be fairly discreet. Also they might not examine you, they might just refer you for a colonoscopy etc.

I hate taking mine to the Drs, also find it hard to get someone to have them - my mum usually steps up though.

They will be fine about it. Hope you are reassured soon, it might be nothing to worry about xx

[chamaeleon]

Receptionists at my surgery have been known to look after kids while mums have a smear as they are not allowed in while it happens. Worth asking? Alternatively do you know any mums at school/nursery? Ring up, tell them you have to go to docs and you will do a swap and look after theirs another afternoon, surely someone would love to exchange kids.

[FlightHattendant]

Have you been on antibiotics before this all began? Just asking in case it is to do with that.

[Jic]

Oh you poor thing

Do you have nice receptionists at your surgery? Perhaps you could explain that you just need to be on your own for 5-10 mins and if they wouldn't mind them sitting in the office with them. They could take some pens and paper or other activity to do whilst they're there. Or maybe if that fails, take them in with you with their books/ pens/ or even chocolate buttons and get them to sit in with you in the surgery itself. They usually have screens for when you're being examined so you needen't even see you, and you don't have to explain later, just sau plainly mummy wasn't feeling well and the doctor made her feel better.

Hope you're ok.

[stanausauruswrecks]

How frightening for you. You may find thet the GP doesn't do an internal, but just get a history and make the referral to a gastroenterologist today. IME, if it's a male GP, they will ask a member of staff to chaperone any examinations, perhaps they could entertain little ones whilst exam is being performed? Bring a treat along with you (for the kids, not your GP ) so that it can be produced at the appropriate time - I know with mine, a packet of buttons will silence them for a short while at least.
You are doing the right thing getting it investigated. I hope it all goes OK today and that you get sorted quickly.

[SpawnChorus]

Sympathies on the bowel probs. I have similar issues, and have had to go to the docs several times over the last few months with my kids (same age as yours) in tow. They've seen the finger-up-the-bum exam on more than one occasion now (and they've also seen me getting a smear). It's not ideal, but they don't seem to have been traumatised by it

I second the suggestion of taking toys / colouring books / snacks to try to keep them occupied. This generally only worked while I was having the boring chatty bit with the doc, rather than the fascinating botty bit, but hey that's better than nothing, right?

Your DH sounds like an arse by the way.

[tinateaspoon]

Thank you lovely people, I will stock up on chocolate buttons, that should do the trick. I will ask the receptionist if someone can just keep an eye on them maybe while I am in there. I just know if they see me in there, the first person we meet on the street will hear all about it they do so like to share their experiences .

I am really trying to be brave, there really is no point worrying unless you need to is there? (says me, I only dreamt of my own funeral last night for goodness sake, why can't my subconscious be more positive ). If I wobble though and come back on here, feel free to give me a slap!

[SpawnChorus]

Oh, and if they ask questions, just tell them the truth. You have a sore tummy/bottom and the doctor is checking it to see what's wrong. DD (4.5) asked and was completely unfazed by my answer. In fact I'm kind of hoping it might make things easier/less embarrassing for her if she ever has to see the doc about nether region problems.

[tinateaspoon]

Hi spawnchorus - I am reassured by the thought they will not be traumatised, although who knows what will come out in therapy in later life . DH is an arse, he drives me mad but I love him for some reason despite him being a total emotional retard. Sometimes I wonder what I have to do to get a hug round here!

[tinateaspoon]

oops cross posts - yes you are probably right I think that honesty might be the best policy, and you are right that it should help them feel less embarrassed about dr examinations.

How are you now? Have you had anything diagnosed?

[SpawnChorus]

Well, I'm 34 weeks pregnant, so there's not an awful lot they can do in the way of examinations at the moment (other than fingering my bottom and poo tests and blood tests).

I'm being treated for Crohn's disease, but the medication doesn't seem to be having any effect at all. The diagnosis was mainly based on the fact that I supposedly had an episode of CD about 10 yrs ago, but several consultants since then have been dubious about the original diagnosis, so I'm still not convinced it is Crohn's disease.

[tinateaspoon]

Oh poor you, its horrible to be having tests when pg, as if you don't have enough to worry about. I needed an MRI when pg and in the end no one could really tell me how safe it was, so I weighed up the risks and decided to wait til after the baby was born, which I did and all was ok. A friend of mine suffered badly with collitis symptoms when pg and was hospitalised. Now she is fine, it seems being pg caused it, I really hope the same is for you after your bubs comes along, not too long for you to wait now.

I had my bottom fingered as expected (a nurse entertained the children on the otherside of the curtain, but they did question me fully about what was going on on the way home . I have been referred for a colonoscopy, based on the symptoms and family history, but the good thing was the doc couldn't feel anything, so I will stop worrying until later on . He didn't put my mind totally at rest though telling me about his brother having bowel cancer who died at a young age. I suppose his point was that he is OK, but I could have done without his anecdotes, but at least he took me seriously. He wants me to have a pelvic scan too to check ovaries etc as the gene can cause probs there too.

Right I will try my best to be jolly, no point being downbeat. Thanks again for all the helpful comments.