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Low libido after having baby- visit to the docs?

(5 Posts)
Rosebud1985 Tue 16-Apr-19 08:43:40


Regular poster but name changed because this is a bit embarrassing.

Since having our baby 5 months ago my libido has disappeared. I’ve been having sex with my husband about once a week but when he tries it on I don’t particularly feel like it, but once we get started I really enjoy it. On occasions I will tell him no if I really don’t feel like it and he’s fine.

I’m worried about the lack of sex drive because if it was down to me to initiate it I never would. I’m EBF my baby and have read that prolactin suppresses your sex drive and that the lack of ovulation means that you can experience some vaginal dryness which is definitely also the case.

When we have sex it’s often a quickie while the baby is sleeping in the same room. So I don’t have much time to ‘warm up’ and also find it difficult to ignore the baby’s presence (though she’s always sound asleep). We have to use lube because my vagina doesn’t get very wet. I think there’s also an element of being ‘touched out’ because I have the baby attached to me most of the day and sometimes just want to be left alone!

I spoke to my husband about this last night and he was great about it, though he asked if there’s anything he can do to make himself more attractive which makes me feel bad. I am attracted to him but just don’t feel like sex. With him or anybody!

Has anyone experienced this problem? And can the GP help at all? I’m hopeful that things will improve when I stop breastfeeding but I’m not sure when I’ll be stopping.

OP’s posts: |
Oldmum55 Tue 16-Apr-19 09:56:00

Stop worrying about it! It's entirely natural and normal, even more so if you are breastfeeding so stop feeling guilty, explain it to your husband and it doesn't have to be intercourse, you can still be intimate and close! You will feel like it again when the time is right!

NannyPear Tue 16-Apr-19 10:01:01

I BF DS until he was 19 months old. The first time we managed to have sex was a few weeks after I stopped BFing, until then it was too uncomfortable or I just really didn't want to do it so the few attempts we had were unsuccessful! My libido came back as normal once I stopped. Mixture of hormones and being touched out, I reckon. Also, in the earlier months I was permanently knackered. Took DH a while to understand it was a situational/hormonal thing rather than a personal thing.

eurochick Tue 16-Apr-19 10:03:40

Perfectly normal. It's nature's way of trying to space out pregnancies a bit. It'll probably come back after you drop breastfeeding.

frenchonion Tue 16-Apr-19 10:05:33

Took me about 2 years to get back to normal.

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