Sorry - this is going to be long.
Firstly I should say that I’ve suffered from heart palpitations to some extent for years - a combination of big thuds, small thuds, very brief flutters and on a couple of occasions slightly longer runs. They always seemed to appear for a few weeks and then I’d have a few weeks respite. Had a 24 hr monitor which didn’t show much other than a few ectopic beats, but sods law, I didn’t actually feel any palpitations when I had it on. I’ve been on beta blockers for migraines and anxiety for 9 years - not that they’ve really made much difference to the palpitations.
Anyway, at the beginning of March I suffered a big Pulmonary Embolism as a result of knee surgery and was rushed into resus and diagnosed (had a CT scan) after a couple of days of some breathlessness and then waking up and suffering from heart palpitations that didn’t stop for about 15-20 minutes. I was told that my heart was put under strain and admitted to the CCU (coronary care unit). I was in hospital for 10 days and discharged on blood thinners (will be in them for 6 months). I’ve been back to A&E a few times since discharge with varying symptoms and had ECGs, X-rays and blood tests but they’ve told me I’m OK and sent me home. I’ve also had an Echo done and it was normal and the respiratory team have signed me off saying my heart is fine and that I can put any ideas of long term problems as a result of my embolism out of my mind.
Funnily enough I didn’t really have any palpitations in hospital or at home until about 2 weeks ago when I started having some - runs of really being aware of my heartbeat, single thuds or a tiny (1 second) flutter and some things that I THINK are palpitations when my throat tightens momentarily and I have a rush of adrenaline, a bit like when you miss a step. I’ve been told by the GP that I have post traumatic stress and generalised anxiety disorder and that the palpitations are as a result of that. I’ve had plenty of other symptoms such as insomnia, chest pains (fortunately they soon to have gone - touch wood), feeling and being sick, obsessively focusing on my breathing, depression etc. I have just started seeing a psychotherapist but we’re still in the fact finding stage and haven’t actually started the therapy itself yet.
But I am in a mess - all I can think about is that there’s something wrong with my heart still and that I’m going to keel over and die at any second.
I was lying down earlier (they mainly happen when I’m lying down) watching the royal wedding - relatively calm and relaxed - when out of nowhere my heart started fluttering and wouldn’t stop. It carried on for about 15 seconds and I screamed for my husband. It stopped temporarily and started again for about another 10 seconds and then stopped and returned to normal.
I was absolutely terrified, completely convinced that something terrible was happening to me. Shaking, hot, just beside myself with fear. All I can now think about is when is it going to happen again, what does it mean, do I have a heart condition/damage they’ve missed?
I seem to be spiralling downwards and I don’t know how to stop it.
Does/has anyone else have/had flutters or palpitations like this?
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General health
Utterly terrified of palpitations - I’m a mess
56 replies
CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger · 19/05/2018 20:27
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